I Promise It Gets Better
by YazminDominguez
Summary: A Peeta and Katniss Fanfic(: Hope you like it! It takes place after the war is over with and Katniss and Peeta are back in District 12 , Katniss tries to commit suicide ... read to find out what happens:D *I do not own the characters nor The Hunger Games All rights to Suzanne Collins(:*
1. Chapter 1

Chapter One – Glass

Katniss-

I woke up that morning feeling particularly awful, miserable and guilty about what happened to Peeta. After all, it was my fault that he got tortured, hijacked and who knows what else, well he does.

I didn't want to get out of bed, because I really didn't have a purpose to do it.

I wasn't allowed to go hunting, since the doctors and Haymitch didn't trust me with a bow and arrow anymore. I was cooped up in my lonely house in the victor's village with two daily visits from Greasy Sae which I wasn't looking forward to. It just reminded me of the people in district 12 before the bombing, sure we didn't have enough to eat, but everybody was pretty happy. When the kids weren't at school, they played in the streets as miners were heading down to the mines for their daily routine. Women who stayed home would be washing clothes or cleaning. It was a typical day in district twelve. And I missed it so much. Thanks to me the ''great, brave and strong ''mocking jay this was all gone. I felt too horrible.

I missed these days. Thinking about this just got to think about my father and how I missed him so much he would be one of the only people who could cheer me up. He would hug me and sing until I felt okay again.

Thinking about my father got me thinking about Prim and I missed her so much too. I missed her laugh and smile while we would dance around the house together. I hated Gale so much for even being part of the event that killed my little sister, even though deep down, I knew that it wasn't his fault, though I didn't want to accept it. I hated the Capital and Snow and Coin and I... I hated myself too.

It's not fair that I got to live while other innocent people who never did anything wrong, died because of what I did in those first games. I should have just let Peeta kill me. Peeta. I miss him also. Every time we cross each other outside I just ignore him. I know he looks at me hoping to have some kind of contact, we haven't spoken in months, and when his beautiful blue eyes meet mine,I feel better. But I just can't do it. It's too painful. And I don't know why.

As soon as I know he's looking at me I run inside and cry , hoping he doesn't hear me . All this was running through my head as I just lay there in my bed feeling so dead. I have nothing to live for, nothing to look forward to.

I stared to get a little dizzy, probably because I hadn't eaten anything last night but a few spoonful of soup Greasy Sae had made me. I just had it with this. I couldn't take more of it. It was probably 10:30 in the morning so Greasy Sae would be out of my house already.

I had my chance. I know it's not right but I just can't live like this anymore. I got up slowly and headed to the bathroom and looked into the mirror. I had bags under my eyes because I basically didn't sleep anymore. Every night was the same damn thing night after night, nightmare after nightmare, about mutts, blood, fallen tributes, about Finnick being destroyed by those horrible alligator mutts, Prim being tortured or Peeta strangling me and the list goes on, it's endless.

My hair was a mess. Up in a high pony tail because I just didn't care enough to braid it anymore, it was full of knots. I turned slightly so I could see the horrible scars on my back. Ugly. I was just ugly.

I remembered how they would dress me up and do my makeup, Cinna made the most beautiful dresses, I miss him and he didn't deserve the end he got, again that was my fault. I miss that girl, she was so pretty and confident looking. But I knew that girl, and she was very sacred too. And here she is completely different, sad, frustrated and going mad, because nothing made sense to her anymore. I screamed at the mirror as I splashed water at it. I wanted to get away from that mirror. I went down to the living room that my sister and mother had once walked in actually thinking life was going to get better before Snow and the Capital ruined it all.

My sister was dead and my mother was far away. I was alone. I could smell the pancakes Sae had so kindly made for me. But I didn't lay one finger on them. I noticed there was a medium sized box on the coffee table in front of the fire place. A tiny smile appeared on my face thinking it was from my mother. I slowly pulled off the tape of the top flaps, only realizing I was so weak, I could barely do it.

What I found inside was a note written on it was the address of who had sent it. It was from the capital. After I read the note, I learned that this was a '' feel better gift'' from someone I didn't even know. I didn't want this. I was furious. I tore away the newspaper revealing a beautiful set of plates glasses, mugs, and silverware and tea cups. A beautiful glass dining set. I instantly hated it.

Why did people even care about me? I was the cause of so many deaths. I just lost it. I grabbed a mug and threw it against the nearest wall while I screamed at it. I did this with two plates, four tea cups, two mugs and one glass. I screamed until I was almost out of breath and until my voice was almost gone.

Then I got an idea. I could end all this here and now. I smiled. I picked up a new glass plate it was pink with roses engraved. It remained me of Prim so I set it down and picked up another it was blue with a swirl design then I threw it at the wall on the other side of the room.

After destroying it I went over to the glass. I smiled as I bent over to pick up an especially jagged pointy piece. I turned around cutting my feet on the ruined plate that was on the floor. I sat down about two feet away from the glass remains and the wall. I was ready to end it all.

As I grazed my wrist with the glass I thought about Prim, my father, Finnick and Rue. I was going to join them. End my life of suffering and being tortured by my own thoughts. ''Finally'' I thought. As I dug a little harder on my wrist with the glass letting out a small yelp I heard the door open, slamming into the wall behind it...


	2. Chapter 2

**Hi guys(: Thanks for all the views! I got my first reviewer ever! Yay! :D. Thanks EverllarkPony :D , you asked me to update, so here it is! Hope you like it! Read , review and follow please:). **

**Chapter 2 – What happened to us? **

Peeta

I woke up early that morning. Hoping that when I opened my eyes I would find my arms wrapped around a beautiful gray eyed girl with long dark hair that smelled of jasmine and wild berries snoring slightly almost humming maybe, smiling as she has a sweet dream. But like every morning after the war ended, I woke up to empty sheets and a frown forming on my mouth. As I open my eyes I realize she's not there but it really doesn't shock me.

I stare at the nothingness wishing she was here. I feel empty. Since the Rebellion and the capital was overthrown and Katniss and I were back in district twelve I could only catch glimpses of her as I tend my flowers and herbs & vegetable garden. She looked terribly depressed. She also looked very skinny as if she hasn't been eating at all. I find that strange because I always see and wave as Greasy Sae walks by my house to go to Katniss's every day. I knew she always cooked for her. Katniss had bags under her eyes that I am sure are because of her nightmares. I hear her sometimes when I'm lying in my bed unable to sleep. She screams pretty damn loud. Every time I see her outside that is what I encounter, she'll hold my gaze for about three seconds and then turn and run in to her house while tears stream down her face. I can never shake the feeling I get when I see her do this, I feel like I should do something but never get the courage to chase after her, I've hurt her many times. Of course I didn't do it on purpose but it still counts because I did it.

I shook my head trying to stop thinking about her, I just made my stiff neck hurt more than it did, it was stiff because I had a nightmare last night, I hated that I get paralyzed when I have these. Slowly I sat up, legs hanging over the edge. ''Stupid Prosthetic'' I whispered to myself. I got up, got dressed and headed to the bathroom to put on my scar medicine and take pills to help prevent the flashbacks I get. I looked in the mirror not quite happy with the guy string back at me. He looked sad. I tried smiling but my eyes gave it away. I washed my face, combed my hair a little. Taking one last look at the mirror I looked sort of like my father when he was younger but I had my mother's eyes. I smiled at the thought of him and then headed downstairs to bake some bread for breakfast.

I made small wheat loves today, but I almost burnt them because I got distracted thinking about Katniss. I haven't seen her smile in such a long time and I miss it. I also miss my family. I felt so lonely. And I had bitter and angry feelings towards the capital. The old one, I know it's not the same government it is today but you can't help feeling angry about it. I told myself to block those thoughts, I didn't want to trigger a flash back this early in the morning. But I couldn't help thinking about it and it got the best of me. I gripped a chair as tight as I could as I relived every horror I've been through these past few years.

After about five minutes my vision cleared up , my head stopped pounding , my heart beat slowed and I could think clearly again. I was starting to get used to them now. I tried not to channel thoughts that would trigger them and I kept myself busy so I didn't have time to think. Every time they were less frequent. I was having them about once every two days for short periods of time. My flash backs lasted about five minutes or so no more than eight. I went to the stash of head ache pills on top of my fridge and took one because my head was still throbbing. After my episode I took my bread out of the oven and put them on the cooling rack. It was probably almost nine in the morning by now. I sat down at the dining table to read a recipe book while I waited for the loaves to cool. At about nine thirty five, I set the book down and walked back to the kitchen to retrieve the bread.

They were still warm but I took them anyway along with a glass of hot chocolate milk and strawberry jam. When I finished having breakfast I headed towards the front door where my gardening boots where located. I slipped into them and went outside in to the warm sun. I trimmed the lawn and the hedges, picked weeds from the herb patch, watered the flower bed and harvested a few ripe tomatoes from the veggie part of my garden.

It was probably about eleven o clock by now so I stared to go back inside to take a shower and get lunch started when I heard the faint sound of glass breaking. Then I heard a scream from 3 houses down from mine. I dropped everything automatically. The tomatoes rolled off the porch but I didn't go after them. As I sprinted towards Katniss's house I heard more breaking glass, screaming and crying, a heartbreaking cry. I started to panic, horrible thoughts swirling in my head.

As I got to the front door I stopped for a moment trying to decide what I was going to do, when I heard more glass shatter , some foot steeps and then after a few moments a tiny yelp that could only belong to Katniss. I guess I did it on impulse really, I slammed the door open and found a skinny girl in very worn out jeans and black tank top on the floor, she had a tear streaked face, dark bags under her eyes and her eyes, her once beautiful gray eyes that were full of fire where now so full of hatred and sadness they were now a faint candle light flame.

She was dying slowly and painfully. I stared at her for a moment thinking how could I let this happen to her, we've been through so much, we had saved each other countless times not just in the games, but from nightmares, and then I just let her fade away like she is? I felt completely guilty. This was my fault I thought. '' Katniss'' I said. Then I realized she had blood on her bare feet. I kept scanning her and found that her right hand was holding something slender, sleek and blue tinted …it was glass. I quickly looked around the room and the floor was littered with broken plates, and they were of every color. I looked back at her and the glass was hovering over her left wrist. Finally it clicked; she was attempting to commit suicide. I felt tears burn down my face, seeing this just tore me apart.

She looked around to see who just slammed the door open to find me staring at her , she glanced at my tears and then had a confused look on her face , then it turned to anger and then sadness again. She then returned to slashing at her wrists when I knelt next to her calmly trying to take the glass away. But she wouldn't let me, she screamed '' why are you doing this? Leave me alone! '' I didn't respond, I just focused on taking that glass away from her. ''Don't you see I'm worthless Peeta?'' She yelled. ''No Katniss, I don't! Because you're not worthless, you're worth more than gold to me! '' I said to her. She still continued to push my arms away. '' I'm not worth your trouble! I don't deserve to live Peeta! Damn you! Just go away!'' I just felt more tears roll down my cheek and stopped to look at her straight into her sad gray eyes. '' You do deserve to live Katniss, it's not your fault that all this happened, stop saying these things''

She hesitated, but since I let go of her, she took the chance to create a deep two inch cut on her wrist. She yelped and tears poured down her face in pain. I have to stop her, partly because she is hurting herself badly and because I just couldn't take any more of this. After much cursing from her part, I managed to take the shard away. 'She so weak' I thought. I picked her up, and much to her dislike, carried her to the couch as she trashed and kicked. I sat her down, while she glared at me. I examined the damage she had done to herself.

I found small cuts and glass stuck in her feet, a deep two inch cut on her forearm along with a four inch one that was pretty deep also that on her wrist, and smaller ones that just looked like scratches. The palm of her right hand was cut; I figured it was because she held the glass there. Lastly she had a good sized gash on her left leg thigh. I loved this girl a lot and seeing her like this is just too much, I sat down on the recliner that faced the couch Katniss was on. While she sat there glaring daggers at me, I stared at her and thought 'what happened to us?'.


	3. Chapter 3

**Hi Guys! I haven't updated in while now, Sorry! Here is chapter 3... Should I end it here? Let me know what you think. Enjoy! :D. **

Chapter 3 - I missed him so much.

Katniss

There was blood everywhere. The worst part is that it was my blood. There was blood on the floor, on the couch I was sitting on and even on Peeta, on his arms, hands and shirt. Peeta was sitting in front of me staring, just staring. I glared at him, he ruined my plan. I tried to take my life, finally stop suffering and he ruined it all. Who was he to just barge in here and stop me?

I know, I sound ridiculous, but I never wanted this to happen! I never wanted him to see me like this. Peeta looked disappointed, as if he expected better, but his eyes, his eyes pleaded me to explain this. His eyes had tears and they told me that he was hurt. I felt so weak, that's the only reason I was sitting still.

After maybe 5 minutes, Peeta came back to earth and got up and walked towards the hall to my bathroom. At first I thought he was going to leave, to abandon me, but then he just headed to the bathroom and stared searching the cabinets. I looked down at my cuts that were still oozing warm red blood. I couldn't believe I did this to myself.

After a while Peeta came back carrying a first aid kit, a bucket with water and soap who's pale yellow color told me it was anti septic and that it was from the capital, the only place you can get it. He came over to me and held my arms firmly so I couldn't pull them away. He started clearing the blood with some cotton balls from the first aid kit and the warm water from the bucket. After he washed my cuts with the soap which stung a little. Then he applied some ointment on my cuts and bandaged them. Lastly he kissed every one of them even the one on my thigh. He had to rip some of my jeans to tend that one. During all this he cried silently, every once in a while I would wipe a tear off his cheek, but that just made more fall.

After he bandaged my cuts he went to the kitchen and returned with a tray, on it was the pancakes, a glass of water and a little pale blue pill I recognized was the one the doctors prescribed me, it was supposed to help with my depression, but I never ever took one since I was here in district twelve. I wanted nothing to do with the capital. I wondered how he knew what that pill was for and how he found it. I hid all my pills on top of my refrigerator. He came over to me, set the tray down and told me to eat at least one pancake and to take the pill. I nodded but I wasn't going to. He turned his back on me to face the fire place, and soon a small fire was started.

After he returned to his place on the recliner he sat down and looked at me. "Eat'' he said. I shook my head. "Eat or I'll call your mom and tell her to come and pick you up, then take you to the capital, to rehab". My eyes widened and I stared to eat. He got me with that, I was not going to the capital, especially to any hospital. He smiled triumphantly. I ate only one pancake took the damn pill and drank the rest of the water; I hadn't realized how thirsty I was. He raised an eyebrow at me after I set the empty glass down. And then said" someone was thirsty". "shut up" I replied. He did.

After a few moments of awkward silence, I said "thanks" signaling to my bandaged arms ''but it wasn't necessary, why did you do it?" He didn't reply, he just wiped a tear from his cheek and sighed. "Answer me Peeta! don't you think your just wasting your time? Because I'm just a waste of time! You should have just let me-" but he didn't let me finish. "What the hell are you saying Katniss? Stop saying that bullshit! You are not a waste of time to me okay?" He was yelling which was strange coming from him, considering he was always so sweet and calm. Fine if he is yelling, I will too. "You are just stupid! You deserve some better than me! A girl who is stronger, someone who is able to give back everything you give! Someone who will love and care for you like you do! I just want you to receive everything you give Peeta."

I knew that these words probably hurt him but I didn't care. I felt tears burn down my face. I glanced at him and realized he had tears streaking his face also. He calmly said" I don't want another girl Katniss, okay? Will you understand that? Maybe I do deserve some one better but I just want you, you and no one else.'' That hurt a little, but I still let a small smile form on my face. "You are so stupid" I told him. He smiled this time. Then made his way to the couch I was sitting on and sat down. He set his elbows on his knees and said "I'm not stupid, I was just saving you and well... myself, this '', he signaled to my wrists, "was very necessary okay? I can't stand the idea of living in a world you aren't in."

I scooted closer next to him and wrapped my arms around him, almost immediately he wrapped his arms around my waist and held me. Then I just broke down, I let my walls fall, rested my head on his shoulder and cried, a horrible chocking noise I didn't know I could make. He just let tears go and stroked my knotted hair. I muttered some apologies about everything, from pretending to love him, to ignoring him to what I said recently, with every apology I wrapped my arms tighter around his neck and he hugged me a little closer. He nodded occasionally but otherwise said nothing.

I realized how much I missed him; everything about him, his warmth, his strong arms, his smell of fresh bread and his kind aura, I always felt more at ease when I was near him. After a long while, I said" I'm sorry Peeta" against the spot between the base of his neck and his shoulder. "Okay" he said. "No, but I'm serious , I really mean it, I'm sorry about this whole situation, I know you care about me, I never meant for you to see me like this" I replied. I pulled my head back to look into to his brilliant blue eyes; I wiped a tear from his cheek and smiled at him. Damn, I missed him so much.

"Katniss" he said " I don't just care about you , you know that , I love you I know it for sure now, at first when I returned here , to district twelve, I wasn't sure what I felt, but when I was fixing you up , I felt that I'm sure about my feelings now, I love you. I knew that if I didn't help you and just let you die, I would have just ended up doing the same thing you did. " he paused for a moment and then said " you don't know how bad I feel about letting this happen to you, I feel this is my fault, I should have checked on you every once in a while , just to make sure you were-" then I shut him up with a kiss.

At first, he was so surprised he didn't kiss me back, but after a few moments he did. I pulled back after a while and snuggled up against him. "Just forgive me Peeta" I said. "You forgive me Katniss "he whispered in reply. "Together" I said smiling against his lips. I remembered the first damn hunger games, when we held those berries to our mouths. I felt him smile too. An understanding passed between us, we forgave each other, just to please the other, we both were feeling guilty, but we just let it pass. The important thing is that we are together again, it's sad that we had to be reunited this way though.

He kissed me this time and I felt that hungry feeling again , the same one I felt on the beach and in the cave, that feeling just craving for more of his lips, kisses and touch. "I promise it gets better Katniss" he said, and I actually believed him. "I love you Peeta" I whispered in his ear. After a long time, I actually felt alive again.


	4. Chapter 4

Hi Guys! :D. Here is chapter four! I hope you like it:D , I had fun writing it. Everllarkglee4ever asked to update so here it is. Reviews are much appreciated! The song mentioned I don't own and it is 'Safe & Sound' By : Taylor Swift ft. The Civil Wars. All rights to them :)

This was so strange compared to this morning, I mean, here I was with the person I loved and cared for the most. We were wrapped together, holding on to each other as if our lives depended on it, well at least mine did. Katniss just told me she loved me, I felt like the happiest person in the world. I just hope she meant it, like for real. "You know I love you more." She smiled at me, and I returned it. I felt something odd course through my veins a feeling I haven't experienced before, a mix of adrenalin with happiness and excitement. I pulled away from her and got up faced the couch and stretched my arms to her so her fingertips could barely touch mine. "Come on "she looked at me with a confused look on her face and said "Where?". " Trust me "I replied. And she followed me up the stairs to the bathroom

"Let's get you cleaned up" I told her. "What? No! I'm not going to bathe in front of you!" She said. "Okay, okay, calm down I didn't expect you to want to anyway." I replied. "Just let me wash out your hair and brush it" I continued. "No" she answered. After a while of me telling her she can't do it herself, that she has too many knots, that she doesn't have the patience to do it, she agreed to my strange request. Sitting on a stool, her head hovering over the large sink, and me standing beside her, I began to brush out the knots, slowly and gently. "Why did you want to do this? She asked. "I miss twirling my fingers through your dark sweet smelling hair" I answered.

She smiled, which made me smile too. When I finally finished, I began to run warm water over her delicate head then applying a sweet jasmine smelling shampoo, making sure none got in her gorgeous eyes. During this we didn't talk much, we were lost in thought. As I massaged her scalp I thought to myself how different this situation was compared to this morning. I smiled at the thought of finally being near her again, without her running away, there were no tears streaming down her face. I looked down to find her looking up at me ,she stared in to my eyes the said " You know I don't deserve you peeta, I could live a thousand years , save thousands of live , do everything I didn't do right the correct way, and still not deserve you." I frowned and bent down to peck her lips "who cares?" I asked her.

She opened her mouth to argue, but then shut it and stared up at the ceiling. As I finished conditioning her hair with the same jasmine scent, I rinsed her hair and told her to sit up. When she did, I wrapped a towel around her hair and went over to the cabinets to take out the blow drier so I could finish my job. "you've done enough already don't you think?" She said. I ignored her and plugged the blow drier in a socket that was near the sink. Then I flipped the switch, drowning out her voice. As I brushed and blew hot hair against her hair, I remembered about Portia, Cinna, and the whole crew, I remembered the wonders they could do, the makeup, the outfits, the hair. I missed them, and I had Snow to thank. "Stop" I said out loud. I didn't mean to say that out loud, but I had to stop thinking about them, I had to block those thoughts.

Katniss turned her head to look at me and saw the frustrated look on my face the she just kissed me. After she took the drier and brush out of my hands and said "that's enough, really". I realized how easily distracted I got when she did that; I stopped thinking about the harmful thoughts but also forgot I had items in my hands. The effect she has on me I thought. "It's probably around 7 already" I told her, glancing at the window. "Let's go make dinner" I continued. Before she could respond, I took her hand but she pulled away. "I want to take a bath" she said. "Okay then, you do that, I'll be down stairs" I responded.

I really don't trust her alone up here, all wet she could slip our something and don't want her bandages getting wet, but I really had no choice. I closed the door behind me and then made my way down stairs. "Be right back!" I yelled up stairs. I went back home to pick up some ingredients and returned to Katniss's house. I felt so glad to be able to walk back in here.

I set the bag of ingredients on the counter and grabbed the broomstick that was resting against the side of the refrigerator. Afterward I started cleaning the trashed living room, there was glass everywhere, of every color, from lime green tinted glass to purple. Mug handles where on the floor too. There were all kinds of designs. I wondered where Katniss got them.

When I finished, I found my answer. I noticed on the coffee table there was a box and inside was an incomplete dining set. The note inside of it was from a woman called Solange Dallas. "That's strange" I whispered to myself, I found this name so familiar. I shrugged since I couldn't remember and headed to the kitchen to start baking some cheese buns, which Katniss loved so much, to go with the chicken breast and green salad I was going to prepare for the both of us. I wanted to make something simple that wasn't too heavy on Katniss's sensitive stomach, since she really hasn't eaten anything lately.

I turned around to turn on the television so I could listen to some music while I cooked. I hummed to some songs while I put the chicken breast I prepared in herbs in the oven, along with the buns. That's when Katniss whispered in my ear "boo". I jumped slightly because I thought I was alone. I turned around to face her and said "hey, you look pretty" she blushed a little and asked me what I was doing and I told her about this evening's menu. "Let me help you" she said. "no it's okay, I can do -" but she was already at the sink with the lettuce rinsing it. I smiled at her, and let out a little laugh. She seemed so alive compare to this morning.

I listened to the music coming from the TV and recognized a lullaby. I soon was standing behind Katniss and wrapped my arms around her waist and sang softly in her ear "just close your eyes, you'll be alright, come morning light , you and I'll be safe and sound" I squeezed her waist and kissed her cheek. She, to my surprise, turned around and wrapped her arms around my neck and planted a kiss on my lips, I felt my eyes close and enjoy her kiss. After pulling away she returned to rinsing and preparing the salad while I got the chicken and buns out of the oven.

The rest of the evening flew past, and I smiled the whole time. She thanked me for making the cheese buns and said everything was delicious even though she ate very little. At one moment I found myself in my shower in my house, rinsing the shampoo out of my hair, with the thought of that I had to go back to Katniss's house after I finished. After that I was staring at a very pretty daisy sticking out of the ground as I was walking back to Katniss's home, I decided I was going to take it to her. As I was walking in her front door, I saw an empty vase on the end table near the stairs railing facing the doorway. I locked the door behind me, filled the vase up and placed the daisy in it, and then I made my way up the stairs to Katniss's room.

She was already asleep when I entered her bed room; I tucked her in and kissed her forehead. As I crawled in next to her she stirred in her sleep and then opened her eyes wide, and reached for her night stand searching for something "Katniss! It's me!" I said in alarm. She seemed to calm down and look at me, finally recognizing me "You scared me!'' She said. "I didn't mean to, sorry, I just came to make you company, to protect you tonight.'' I told her. She smiled and set the knife she was holding back in her nightstand drawer. "You look just like Haymitch'' I joked and she playfully punched me before resting her head back on her pillow.

After I laid down my head down and got comfortable, she snuggled up against me and almost instantly fell asleep. I kissed her forehead, hugged her close and for the first time since the victor's tour, I slept blissfully , one time waking up to a screaming and crying Katniss but that settled down after I hugged her real tight and muttered some comforting words. The next morning I woke up to a beautiful pair of gray eyes and a smile from ear to ear. I kissed her lightly on the lips before getting up, washing my face and heading down to start breakfast.

As we sat down to eat our, honey oat bread and tea, we heard footsteps on the porch. I got up to answer the door bell and found the one and only Haymitch. "Peeta! I haven't seen you in a while". I glared at him; he was ruining my first morning with Katniss in like forever. "Hey sweet heart" he said as barged right past me and he sat down at the table, helping himself to some bread. "Hi" Katniss said. "Well I heard your screaming yesterday, I came to make sure you're all right." I wanted to smack him; just now he was interested in checking on her? "I'm fine Haymitch" she told him, glancing and smiling at me. Her smile calmed me down but I was still angry, 'block these thoughts Peeta ' I told myself. "It's strange to see you here Peeta'' he said.

Thoughts about how he didn't tell us about the 75th Hunger games swarmed in my head, thoughts about the capital, everything I shouldn't be thinking about. "What do you mean?" I glanced at Katniss who was staring at her tea glumly. "Well the other day, sweetheart over here was telling me about how she hated you and such, how she felt lonely. How she had nightmares about you strangling - "I didn't let him finish, I felt tears roll down my face, I went over to the vase with the daisy and sent it smashing on the ground. I glared at Katniss as she cried "I didn't say that!''. I knew it was all too good to be true. "Yeah, and I'm supposed to believe that?" I yelled at her, thoughts boiling in my head.

Then I turned around and ran towards the open door. I ran as far as I could, I wasn't really sure where to just far from Katniss and Haymitch. I felt my head pound and my vision fog; I saw my hijacked memories flash. I was having a flash back, a really strong one, but this time I didn't have my pills or a chair to hold on to.


	5. Chapter 5

**Hey Guys(: I hope you like this chapter! Reviews are appreciated! Thanks for all the views:D. **

**Chapter 5 – A very stupid idea. **

**Katniss-**

Just as I thought I was finally going to start my life again from zero, with Peeta by my side, of course to my luck, it was ruined. And whose fault is it? Mine. I felt my world crumble as Peeta left. "Peeta!" I cried as he ran but he just ignored me. I got up to chase after him, but I felt a pair of arms, not the familiar strong and gentle ones that belonged to Peeta, but rough and larger ones took their place. Haymitch was pulling me back.

"What the hell Haymitch! Let go of me! You've done enough already!" I yelled at him. "Just calm down sweet heart, you can't go chasing after him, he'll come back." he said. " what is wrong with you? You saw we were perfectly fine and getting along with each other when you came in! Did you have to say that I said that? Damn you Haymitch!" I paused took a deep breath then continued. "If it wasn't for him , I ... I wouldn't even be here! I just can't wrap my mind around the fact that you just can't see me happy; you are always saying things to hurt me! You ruined everything just when I thought it was getting better. Just because you don't have any family or friends that care about you, doesn't mean you have to go around messing up other people's relationships!" As soon as those words came out of my mouth I regretted them. I gasped and then clamped my hand over my mouth.

I knew Haymitch had lost his family, friends and even his girlfriend to the capital. "Haymitch" I said softly. All the anger I had about five minutes ago drained right out of me. I stared at his face and for the first time, I saw Haymitch cry. He wasn't really crying , a single tear rolled down his cheek. "I am so sorry! Oh my gosh, I can't believe I said that, I'm so sorry." He just looked at me, hurt in his eyes. Then walked past me, and he was out the door.

I stood still for a long time, and then I sobbed. Tear after tear rolled down my face. I seamed paralyzed, I wasn't sure of what the hell I was going to do to get Haymitch to forgive me. I wasn't sure about how I was going to find Peeta either. Just like that , in under an hour , two people I cared a lot about were hurt because of me, and they also had just left my house crying, I just hoped they hadn't walked out of my life. I had to figure out a way to fix the damage I'd done.

But in that moment nothing but guilty thoughts filled my mind, I sat down on the floor, just as I had yesterday morning, the same kind of thoughts going through my mind. The difference was that today no Greasy Sae would come to make me breakfast, she had come to my house yesterday, when Peeta was gone. I had told her with a big smile on my face that she didn't need to cook for me anymore because Peeta and I were reunited. I remember she congratulated me also smiling then left.

I felt so empty again, all the little strength I had recovered last night were drained right out of me. I sat on my hard cold floor , just like yesterday , I was pondering about trying to take my life again , but I was sure that this time , there was not going to be anyone to save me in case I regretted my decision. Peeta wasn't going to come rescue me again. I hated this; I hated myself and the way that nothing ever came out like I would like. The damn odds were never in my favor. All I wanted right now was Peeta, and his arms holding me until I was okay. I realized that, that was one of the things I most loved about him, the way he comforted me. He did it the same way my father had many years ago.

I felt tears roll down my cheeks and wondered how I still had enough water in my system to produce them. I had cried so much during these past few weeks. I turned my thoughts back to Haymitch and how could I have been so cruel. I cared a lot about him, and I was his friend. I knew he probably went back to his house to just get drunk again. I just hope he'll be willing to forgive me. The conversation I had with him felt so long ago. I remember it was probably four days ago.

I had went over to his house because I needed someone to talk to , I had crossed Peeta outside and I was crying so badly I went over to his house to what? Get comfort? I really don't know why I went over there. I guess it was just to be with another human being without breaking down in to tears.

_"Haymitch?" I yelled as I walked through the front door. I heard someone move in the living room so I went right to that room. "Haymitch?" I repeated. "Hey Katniss " I heard some say in my ear. I turned around startled and found a pair of gray eyes staring back at me. "Hi" I said. "What do you want?" Asked Haymitch , I knew he wasn't trying to be rude , he was like that. "Well, I came to see how you're doing and um…" he raised an eyebrow at me. "Okay fine, I was just feeling more horrible than usual, so I came to talk to you" I told him ''I'm listening'' he said while making a gesture with his hand that told me to go on._

_I opened my mouth to speak and I instantly felt my eyes start to water. "Don't cry sweet heart, let me throw a wild guess out there hmm, you are upset because of Peeta? " he asked. I wondered how this man could read me so well, I guess because we're a like on so many levels. I looked up at him and nodded my head, then I made my way to the couch and he followed. _

_"Want a drink?" he asked before I nodded my head again in reply. As he handed me a glass of liquor, I said "I feel so ... Empty" the last word was hard to get out. "I feel empty without him and I hate the feeling that I have to depend on some one. I absolutely hate it. I hate him for making me feel useless without him, as if I can't function correctly." I finished and waited for Haymitch to reply. I spun the light brown liquid in my glass and then looked at him. After a while he said "look, I don't have the solution to your problem, unless you want to drown your sorrows like I do" he said that as he raised up his own glass '' but I don't want you to do that , haven't you tried talking to him? I mean the kid seems fine now, I don't think he's going to attack you anymore" he finished. _

"_I still have night mares about that, I swear I can feel his hands around my neck up to this day. I don't ever talk to him, I just ignore him, and it's too painful to think about all we have been through and to have it stripped away by the capital. Peeta doesn't really know who I am . I feel like I hate him Haymitch, yet I love him at the same time, and that just makes me hate him even more. Does that even make sense?" I took a nice swig from my glass and felt the liquor burn down my throat. I shook slightly and stared at the mess around me, there were wrappers, empty bottles, and clothes all over the place. _

_Then Haymitch said "I don't know what to say Katniss, you're in deep shit. You have your emotions at war with each other right now, part of you misses and wants him, and the other wants nothing to do with him.'' He paused and continued "just keep this in mind, you are all he's got, and he is all you have. I told you before that you don't deserve him and I stand by it, but you two belong together. Maybe it was a romance created to please the capital, but I'm sure it grew in to something real after all. You're lucky to have someone who cares about you so much, you are lucky that she, or he in this case, didn't get killed because of you.'' _

_I sighed at his words because I knew he was talking about his girlfriend the one he had lost to the capital so long ago. ''He almost did die, almost. And it was because of me. '' I said in response. "Just don't let him go Katniss ,I hope he is gets tired of chasing you , though I don't think it's likely , that stupid boy should find some who values his love." at this point I was crying , his words hurt a lot , but I knew he was right. "I'm going to get going, thanks for the drink" I said as I got up and placed the glass on the end table. When I got to the door, I turned around and muttered "Bye Haymitch." Then I was out the door. _

Thinking about it now, Haymitch was right of course, Peeta is all I truly have. But I tried to convince myself that it wasn't true, I had my mom though she was far away and… Gale. "Gale" I whispered to myself. I immediately got up and headed to my phone. As I was standing in front of the phone I was thinking if I really wanted to do this , I mean, I hated Gale for what happened to Prim , but I guess that I was tired of hating people ,I was so desperate for love , comfort and some kind of contact with someone without suffering, I decided to do it. I knew the number of his district two home since this was not the first time I considered calling him. I dialed the phone and heard the beep and my heart skipped a beat. Another beep passed and my heart was thumping really fast. Third beep and then a familiar voice said "hello?"

It was a girl's voice. I felt my heart drop and I held my crying back, I could have fainted right then and there. There was a tiny voice in the back of my head saying this was a bad idea, a really bad and stupid idea, that I should say 'oops wrong number' and hang up but I was so messed up emotionally, I really didn't care.


	6. Chapter 6

**Hi guys! Oh my god! More than one thousand views? Thank you :'). I hope you like this chapter! Let me know what you think:D. Reviews are appreciated. **

**Chapter 6 – The woods**

**Peeta-**

When I recovered from my flash back, I felt the usual feeling that was as if all the strength had been drained out of me. Like always my vision cleared and my muscles relaxed. I was with my back against a huge pine tree, at first my head hurt so much I had to close my eyes and wait until it passed. I was probably underneath that pine for a couple hours; I had a very strong flash back this time. When I had come around for good, I realized I was in the woods.

I had never been in here, but I felt at peace, maybe because of the fresh air or the song of the mocking jays. I had no idea how or why I ended up here, but I'm glad I did. It's peaceful. But the more I came back to normal, the more I remember about the situation I was in. Sometimes the song of a mocking jay hurts. The song of a particular mocking jay hurts me the most, maybe I didn't hear the song directly, I heard someone repeat it but it still hurt so much to know that she had sung it. This specific mocking jay was named Katniss.

I was still in shock to know that she had said to Haymitch that she hated me. I felt tears roll down my face. I regret everything I had said and the way I reacted at her house, I should have listened to her. I don't even trust Haymitch anymore, so I don't know why I believed what he said. I had a feeling that I was waiting for something like this to happen, that it was all too good to be true. It was all like a dream, Katniss and I being together like that, reunited so quickly, I should have saw it coming.

As I sat against the pine , I drew in to the rich dirt with a stick , at first I let my hand wander , then I realized I was drawing a girl , a beautiful girl , long hair the same color as the soil. I sighed and rubbed my hand over the drawing ruining it. I didn't want to see her face anymore. I placed my head against the tree and stared off in to the distance, listening to the birds sing. What a beautiful place this was. No wonder Katniss loves it so much. These woods were so peaceful and relaxing compared to the arena of the 74th Hunger Games. I was at ease here unlike the woods of the arena, where I was thinking about if I would wake up the next day.

I was thinking about what my next move was going to be, how I would go back to Katniss' house, when I heard something stir a few yards away. I heard footsteps and then cracking branches. I stood up as quickly as I could as tried to calm down my breathing. 'I have to get out if here' I thought. "Who's there?" I called. 'Did she come to find me?' I smiled at the thought. "Peeta?" I spun around to this familiar voice yet I couldn't put my finger on who it belonged to exactly.

Then I saw her, she was this pretty girl I ran in to a couple times down by the new buildings at the town square. The square hasn't been completely rebuilt but I had swung around a couple times a week to check out how the bakery is pulling through, I was thinking about running it myself. I have also gone down there to buy things from the few shops that were already open. Every day, more and more people arrived back in district twelve, it was nice to see but it was also depressing at times. Anyways I have seen this girl at the vegetable market since she runs it. I never really paid much attention, but I knew her name was Navy. She was about maybe 20 - 21, a little older than I was, but she had a kind face. Navy came over to me smiling. I remained with my back to the pine.

"What are you doing out here?" She asked. "Nothing um... Just getting some fresh air." I replied. She raised an eyebrow as If not convinced but I didn't care, I wasn't in the mood to talk to someone right now. As she was standing right in front of me she asked "What's wrong?" I shook my head and slid back down against the tree. "Okay..." She said as she sat down next to me. "Come on, you can tell me, it's okay." she insisted. "Nothing, I'm fine." I said flatly. "Oh, okay I'll leave you alone then" she said as she got up and started to walk away. After she was a few feet away I decided I did want to talk to someone "Wait!" I yelled.

I didn't want her to go, I guess talking to someone won't do me any harm , I needed a friend to confide in at this moment , sure I don't even know this girl but she seemed really kind and caring. She turned around on her heel and walked back in my direction, then sat down on the floor next to me. "I'm feeling kind of down" I told her. She listened and waited for me to continue but since I didn't she said "look, I don't know you at all, but if you need someone to talk to, I'm here okay? I won't tell anybody, I'm good at keeping secrets." I smiled and I felt she was being truthful. "I sort of got in a fight with Katniss" I said.

I didn't need to explain who Katniss was, since the whole nation knows about her, and about me, and well... about us. "Oh well, I'm sorry about that" she said in a comforting voice. Then I proceeded in telling her everything since I arrived at here in district twelve. She would just nod, as I cried silently, I confided in her every little thing, every little detail I was keeping to myself, and it felt good. It felt reliving to have someone who will listen, I felt like a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders as I finished. Navy pushed a stray strand of reddish brown hair behind her ears and stared at the ground. She nodded as if deciding on something with herself and finally said "I usually always have something to say, but this time, you left me with absolutely no words, nothing at all "she said as she chuckled. I don't know why but I laughed at little too, I guess I was so stressed that it came out like a crazy sort of laugh, but Navy didn't say anything.

"I wasn't expecting you to say anything either" I told her. "What are you doing out here anyways?" I asked her. "Well I was going to go harvest some of the apples you know, since we're in autumn, to sell at the market. "She said in reply holding up a bag of big red apples. I nodded. "What do you think I should do? You know about Katniss?" I asked. "Want an apple?" she said interrupting me, and then offering me one. "Thanks" I said before biting in to the apple she gave me. "I think you should talk to her, hear her out, she deserves a chance to explain her self you know." She said, and then bit into her own apple. "I think you're right" I admitted then turned my head to my right to face her.

She looked at me and I looked into her eyes and realized they were green. My eyes widened because I've never seen eyes as green as hers, I've seen Finnick but they were different, his were sea green and charming, hers were softer looking and were of a brighter shade of green with a hint of blue. Finnick I thought to myself. I was determined not think of him, I didn't need another flash back right now. "What?" She asked. "Nothing, it's just that I've never seen eyes like yours before. Especially not here in district twelve."

People here had blue eyes like mine, which were usually people from one of the merchant's families, gray seam eyes like Katniss, or even some people even have brown ones. So it was rare to see green eyes in district twelve. She stared at me and then giggled. "Okay ... Well my grandfather was from district four, don't ask me how he ended up here in district twelve , but my mom had these eyes and now I do" she said staring into my eyes. "Oh ..." I said. And before I knew it , we both have leaned in and soon our lips were touching , we kissed for a few long moments but the second she pulled away , I felt ... Wrong .

They were not the lips I was used to; they were more aggressive and slightly thinner than the gentle one that would always let me dominate the kiss, the ones that would always let me be in command. These lips were nothing like Katniss' and it just felt wrong; I didn't feel any flames not even a spark, nothing. It was so foreign and strange yet trilling to explore a different pair of lips. I still enjoyed it but then I decided this was wrong, I loved Katniss.

Navy had the same confused expression on her face and said " I ...I'm so sorry, I don't know what I was thinking. I didn't mean to." I said nothing and then she pursed her lips and asked "I wasn't that bad was I?" I chuckled and shook my head. "This'' she said while making a swirl gesture with her finger '' never happened, okay?" she finished. I felt instant relief, I liked this girl but not in the way I liked Katniss. I finally found a friend, someone who wasn't Katniss; I didn't feel that lonely anymore. "You got it" I agreed smiling before biting in to my sweet red apple.


	7. Chapter 7

**Hello! Here is chapter 7 I hope you enjoy it! Thank you so much for the views and remember all reviews are appreciated! :D. Favorite and follow if you like :D. **

**Chapter 7 – We catch up.**

**Katniss-**

About 5 hours after I called Gale, he arrived at my front door. I was in my living room, thinking about what a stupid idea this was when I heard the doorbell ring and I sat paralyzed for a few moments, this was going to be awkward. I hoped I wouldn't lash out at him, blaming him for what had happened to my little sister.

After he rang the doorbell rang again I decided I couldn't keep him waiting any longer. I got up, shaking slightly and made my way towards the door. I braced myself for what was about to come, things could turn out really terrible or really great. I took a deep breath and turned the door knob. I opened the door and found myself face to face to a boy; well he was a man now, that I had hated just a little while. He had a nervous look on his face but otherwise smiled at me.

I looked in to his gray eyes and saw a small resemblance to the boy I had met in those plentiful woods long ago. No matter how many scars he earned though out the years or how he styled his hair , his face remained almost the same and those seam eyes always were a dark shade of gray , they always looked rough , blocking out everybody , they looked dangerous and would scare you of he was glaring at you. But , like now , they sometimes looked scared , many years ago they were scared that he wouldn't have food to bring back to his family , but now , I wasn't sure why they were scared.

I decided to break the ice and said "Gale...". He stared at me and then said my name. Without hesitation, without asking, without thinking about it, I flung myself in to his arm. He hesitated though, as I was going to pull away, he gripped my waist and then wrapped his arms around me. "Gale" I said in to his neck. I cried, I wasn't sure why, but it felt good to have someone to shelter you from the world, to hide you. It felt good to have a shoulder to cry on, a shoulder that would hide your tear streaked face away as you wept. It felt good crying, I had so many emotions bundled up that I was forced to release them all at once.

"I missed you catnip" he admitted to my neck, I smiled and hugged my arms around his neck tighter. "I missed you too Gale" I told him. I took in the situation I was in; I took in his buff arms around my waist, his smell which was fresh scented cologne. I noticed I was slowly recovering and wasn't crying as hard as I was a while ago. But, I also realized this felt ... Wrong. I mean, sure, Gale was my best friend once upon a time, but I felt this wasn't the person I wanted comforting me. I wanted another man, one with blonde hair and blue eyes. The one person that with two words could harm me as well as heal me. The one man that could brighten up my day with a simple sentence. I wanted Peeta. What was I thinking on calling Gale? I wasn't thinking, that's it.

When we finally pulled away, he looked into my eyes and then kissed my cheek. I blushed then turned around to face the inside of my house, as I invited him in. When we were both sitting at the table silently he asked "so, how's life been treating you?" I stared at him, not sure if I should get mad or just shake it off. How was life treating me? Was he joking? Well, life was not fair all right.

"What do you think?" I asked back. He looked down at his hands and said nothing. Okay maybe I was a little too hard on him; after all he did come after I called him. "Sorry, it's just that, that's not a good way of asking. I feel horrible Gale." He looked up at me, concern in his faced and asked "why? What happened?" I took a deep breath and continued "I don't feel like living anymore, I don't really feel like I'm needed, like I'm useful, I'm not even allowed to hunt!" I waited a few moments before he responded "well, try to find something you're good at that doesn't involve pointy objects. And for the not living anymore feelings, as long as you not trying to kill yourself, I wouldn't worry" he said the last part chuckling.

'Oh if you only knew' I thought. I felt sort of guilty or ashamed even. I guess it probably showed on my face because he stared at me, raising an eyebrow and said "Katniss... What does that look mean? Don't tell me you've -". I couldn't hear him talk anymore I felt anger start to boil inside me, so I yelled "yes! Okay maybe I did try to kill myself! I couldn't take any more of this shit of a life style! I had it with being lonely! Maybe I wouldn't have needed to feel that way if you hadn't left me for that 'fancy' " I made quotation marks with my fingers in midair while I said fancy " Job! The only reason while I'm still breathing is because Peeta came in and rescued me! When will I stop owing this boy?" That last part I really said to myself. I was angry at Gale; he had abandoned me when I most needed him.

"I needed you Gale, but where was my best friend? The one who promised that would be there always? In district 2 with his stupid girlfriend! You changed me for her? You knew I was destroyed after what happened to Prim, and you know what? I think you had some part if that little event! She meant the world to me, and you took her from me, Thanks Gale. I'm sorry I even called you." I finished slamming my palms on the table and then crossing my arms in front of my chest. I had tears running down my face, when I said 'you' to him, I was really talking to the capital, to Snow and everybody else that belonged to that repulsive city.

I knew Gale wouldn't have ever harmed Prim much less kill her but, I wanted to hurt him as much as he hurt me when he disappeared from my life. He stared at me in shock; I couldn't tell if he was angry, sad or just confused. His face was expressionless. "Answer me!" I screamed at him. "I didn't feel you needed me anymore, since you had bread boy with you over here! You want to know why I accepted that job so far away? Because I wanted to be as far away from you and Peeta as I could. I couldn't stand the idea if you two prancing around district twelve hand in hand. I'm sorry that you feel I abandoned you Katniss but I just couldn't do it. And for your information I had no clue about the parachutes that killed your sister!"

He said as a tear glistened in his eye. "I had no idea, I swear on everything I am and love that I didn't know and I will never forgive myself for that, I was on that hovercraft, yes I was! But how was I supposed to know? I am truly sorry Katniss. I cared for Prim as if she was my little sister and I would not have done anything ever to harm her." He said sternly staring me down daring me to answer him. I didn't know what to say, I opened my mouth slightly, waiting for something to come out but nothing did. Then he said "Yeah and I'm sorry you called me too".

I burst in to more tears because he really did it with the last sentence. I crossed my arms on the table and rested my head on them, sobbing. He waited a few moments and then said "stop crying, I didn't mean for you to get upset, but it's really annoying that I had to borrow a hovercraft, fly five freaking hours to this place, see the whole district destroyed just to come and argue with you. If you wanted to fight, we should have done so on the phone." I couldn't help but let out a small laugh. "Damn you Gale" I said laughing. He sounded like a five year old that was pouting.

He smiled at me. "Who was the girl that answered your phone?" I asked with a small voice" he blushed and said "Oh nobody… just a girl." "What's her name? I swear I know her voice" I said with a teasing voice. "Well, after the rebellion we started talking and comparing weapon preferences and" I interrupted him by saying "Tell me her name Gale". " Her name is Johanna" When he said that I was completely shocked. Johanna? That was interesting I thought to myself. "Well , I guess you guys suit each other." I said flatly. I wasn't jealous, well I was but it was a sisterly form of jealously. He once told me he loved me, but I really didn't accept it. He moved on much quicker than I thought.

Then Gale asked me "How's Peeta? " Instantly I frowned. "Fine I think. Well I haven't seen him since this morning at about 9. He is sort of really mad at me." I told him. Gale rolled his eyes and asked me why. So I told him about my conversation with Haymitch four days ago and how our perfect morning turned into a heartbreaking event. I told him about Peeta leaving and what I said to Haymitch. Gale remained silent the whole time. But then he asked "Wait, what was Peeta doing here at nine in the morning?"

I felt my face flush, why did he care what Peeta did? "He…um sort of spent the night at here. I mean after he cleaned my cuts, cooked dinner went to his house and came back he stayed here and we slept together, don't get the wrong idea though." I rushed through my words as I said them. "What? What do you mean he cleaned your cuts?" I shyly showed him my wrists. He grabbed them and stared for a little while. "This is how you tried to die Katniss? This is how you repaid everybody that died in the war? This is how you repaid Prim? You should honor them by staying alive! I can't believe this happened." He paused when he saw my tears and calmed down.

"I'm sorry, I just… I'm just grateful Peeta did come back to district twelve after all, I don't think I would have reacted the way he did." He admitted then getting up and hugging me. Then I got up to receive his hug. As he pulled away the doorbell rang. I looked in the direction of the door and wondered who it could possibly be. I wasn't expecting anybody apart from Gale. "I'll go get it" he told me and he made his way towards the door.


	8. Chapter 8

**Hello! Well, I haven't updated in such a long time! Sorry about that. Here is chapter 8! Hope you guys like it :D, reviews are always appreciated! Thanks for all the views :')**

Chapter 8 – Gale

Peeta-

I felt great.

We probably spent five hours in those beautiful woods. Navy and I chatted for a long time. We talked about our lives, about our families and just about everything. We talked about happy and depressing moments we've lived. I basically poured my heart out to this stranger, which in a matter of hours had done the same with me.

I learned she was twenty years old, newly aged, since her birthday was on July twenty second. Her grandfather had come to district twelve from district four she thinks he might have snuck here on a train but she isn't really sure. The fact that her grandfather comes from the fishing district explains her green eyes. She had three brothers which only one, that was 14 years old, survived the bombing.

Her dad had died a long time ago, and her mother hadn't made it through the bombing. I realized Navy was a funny, sweet and outgoing person, but when It came to talking about family, she turned serious and had a sad look in her eyes. I told her about Katniss, my flashbacks, my family and about Katniss. Oh and about Katniss. Katniss. That's the only topic that could and would slip through my lips. She probably was sick of hearing about her, but she didn't say anything. After we chatted our heads off, I finally decided it was time to head back to Katniss's house.

With my renewed confidence, I thought I could fix everything starting with listening to her. Navy approved of my plan and walked with me to the start of the visitors' village path. I hugged her good bye, and we decided on meeting tomorrow at the market. As I walked up the path, I picked some wild flowers for the gray eyes girl I was going to go visit. My gorgeous gray eyed girl. When I got to the front door, I took three deep breaths before ringing the doorbell. After I rang it, I waited a few moments. Then I heard footsteps coming towards the door, but by the sound, I thought they were too noisy to be Katniss's. They sounded like boots, big heavy boots. When the door opened, I found a pair of gray eyes, but they weren't Katniss's.

They were meaner looking. Gale. I raised my eyebrows in confusion. I didn't understand what he was doing here. I glanced behind him and saw a pale looking Katniss with a scared look on her face. I tossed behind me the flowers I had picked. I hadn't even left for a day and she already replaced me. "Hello Gale" I said holding out my hand before he shook it. Gale looked buffer then the last time I saw him.

We both stood there staring at each other seizing each other up, and I couldn't feel anything but betrayal. When my arm tensed about to punch him in the face, Katniss must of sensed it and stepped in between us. "Hi there Peeta" she said, and I felt my muscles relax. "Hello Katniss" I said in reply. I saw a smile flicker on her lips and was about to go embrace her when I remembered Gale was here. But after a while I couldn't hold it in anymore and grabbed her, wrapped my arms around her, sighing. She replied with a little squeeze of her arms around my neck. I squeezed her lightly and then she let go, and I knew it was because of Gale.

After inching my way past him, I made my way to the dining table. They followed me, Gale still eying me. Katniss and I were sitting at the table, Gale was standing behind Katniss her, hovering over her protectively as if I was going to lash out and bite her or something. I could help thinking about how he looked like her older brother protecting her, wanting to beat the boy that harms her, to a pulp. I had a feeling that that's what he wanted to do to me at this instant.

"Uh, I wanted to, um, talk to you Katniss" I said to her, not minding Gale staring daggers at me. "Uh, okay Peeta" she said. I waited for Gale to take the hint that I wanted to talk just to Katniss. Alone. He eventually rolled his eyes and went to the office, slamming the door behind him. Immediately I turned on Katniss and asked "What the hell is he doing here?" She looked sickly pale but she responded "I needed someone to talk to, and he was the only person I had left, Haymitch is angry at me, you ran out the door furious, to be honest I was scared when you reacted to Haymitch's words. Instead of smashing the vase and running I would have appreciated you letting me speak!" 'The conversation changed very quickly' I thought. I glanced at her and she had anger in her eyes.

"You're right and I'm so sorry, I feel ashamed of what I did , but, I know there are really no excuses, but I was under the influence of a flash back , after I ran out the door I found myself in the woods , I am really sorry, you know I don't want to be apart from you anymore." I said to her calmly. Katniss trained her eyes on me , waited a few moments and said "I didn't actually say I hated you to Haymitch, I said I hated the feeling of needing you , that I hated you for that , but , I loved you and that made me hate you more. I don't hate you Peeta. Really! And Gale came here because I called him, I needed someone and I sort of called him on impulse." Then she quickly said "I'm still glad he came though" just in case Gale was listening, which he probably was.

I paused, repeating her words in my mind, she needed me? I smiled and felt a warm sensation spread through my body. I saw Katniss's eyes open wide as if she were excited and said "did you know Johanna is his girlfriend now?" My mouth opened slightly. But this made sense. They both had such... Fiery personalities. 'This is enough talking , we cleared up enough' I thought, we would have to keep discussing this , about me leaving and what exactly happened , but it was time Gale came out. Then Katniss went to go get him.

As he made his way to the table, he was still glaring at me; I finally got sick of it and asked him "Can I help you with something? If not, you can stop glaring at me." He blinked and had a surprise look on his face and then said "Not really, but I just wanted to give you my thanks, for patching up Katniss after her little er incident" it was my turn to be surprised, Gale Hawthorne was thanking me. "It was my pleasure" I said in response. "But still, listen, If you make her cry one more time, I swear I-." He was interrupted by Katniss. She had put her palm on his chest, as if pushing him back. She then said to him "that's enough Gale" I felt very angry at his comment. I can't bare seeing Katniss sob so why would I ever harm her in any way on purpose?

'At least I didn't abandon her' I thought but anger leads me to saying "as if I did it on purpose! I would never hurt her if I can help it. I'm pretty sure we both know that, and don't come threatening me about harming her when you walked out of her life without warning! After her sister died, you should have gone to her and explained, let her know you didn't cause her death. At least I didn't abandon her!" I yelled at him. Katniss cried out his name. I was puzzled because I wasn't sure why. And that's when his fist hit my jaw.

I found myself on the floor, legs sprawled out. I could feel my jaw swell after the impact gale had inflicted on me. At first I didn't understand what happened, but then I relished the strange feeling of pleasure. I made Gale regret his disappearance, sure, Katniss did block him out a little, but to me, that was no excuse. A wild smile flickered on my lips.

I simply got up glanced at Katniss's pale face, took a look at Gale's face and laughed. Gale's confused expression was what caused me laughter. I knew words hurt more than swelling jaws. My jaw will heel, but my words will never leave his mind. 'Good' I thought to myself. I still returned the favor and left a good sized welt on his left cheek just under his eye.

I was satisfied.

Before he could continue beating me, Katniss put herself between us; she was screaming ''Stop! Please!" I stepped back, willing to end this fight, but Gale was more reluctant. After a while of coaxing on Katniss's part, he eventually calmed down. I stared at him. He then spoke up and said "I'm sorry" I raised an eyebrow and waited for him to continue "Your right. I know. Sorry." He said reaching his hand out towards mine. Confused I thought 'what just happened? Was this a sort of truce? It would be nice to be on good terms with Gale. I don't hate him , I don't even dislike him , but I still didn't care about him. My feelings towards him had always depended on Katniss, but now that I have her, now that I am sure they are just friends, that he even has girlfriend, things could change maybe. Just maybe. "We're even then?" He nodded. I hesitated, but then shook his hand.


	9. Chapter 9

**Hello(: I felt like writing a sweet chapter about Katniss and Peeta , I hope you enjoy it! Reviews are appreciated! Let me know what you think :D. Thanks for all the views! **

**Chapter 9- Blooming**

**Katniss- **

So here I was, standing before Peeta and Gale. Two of the few men I have ever loved. And they were shaking hands? I was very perplexed, one minute they were punching each other and the next they were getting along. Did I miss something? After hearing Peeta's strong words towards Gale I realized he was right. Gale had abandoned me, but have I also shut him out? Okay, maybe a little.

I still can't believe he said that, but I am sort of glad he did. I knew I shouldn't have felt that, but it was satisfying to have someone say your unspoken words out loud. I couldn't help being amused at Peeta's self-satisfied face after he had screamed at Gale and then got punched. I don't think he really cared about his injury. I had expected him to go all crazy and punch him back immediately and when he didn't I was confused. I thought he was going to have an episode. A memory surfaced and it was of when Mitchell had died. How Peeta had gone berserk.

I was afraid, but I had no need to, that Peeta was gone now. The old one is slowly coming back to me. I saw his jaw, all swollen and changing slowly to a reddish color that would then turn to purple. I saw Gale's upper cheek do the same. When they both turned towards me, I stared at them; I still didn't know what to do so I did the only thing that came to mind. I stared crying. I have no idea why, but I think they were tears of joy.

I hoped I could finally stand in the same room with them both, not having to have an edgy air. "Katniss? What's wrong?'' Peeta asked me. "Yeah what happened to you?" Asked Gale. "Nothing, I'm just, glad you two are getting along" they both looked at each other and then Gale said "um, we are just starting from zero really, with no hard feelings." "Oh" is all I could say.

After Gale had refused to let me try and heel his bruise I had only managed to get some ice on him. Peeta had accepted my offer before we were standing in my bathroom, with me searching the cabinets for something to put on him to speed the healing up, to maybe get the blood flowing or something to stop the swelling , but I found no such thing. I started to get the feeling that they didn't exist, that the only cure was ice.

I was pawing through the cabinet with my back towards Peeta, when I felt a pair of arms hug me from behind. I tensed but then I reminded myself that they were Peeta's arms. He wrapped them around my waist and pulled me closer to him. He then whispered in my ear "I know there isn't anything for my jaw Katniss, but I just wanted to tell you, you're so pretty when you're worried." I smiled and felt a warm sensation spread from my ears to my toes. I think I blushed.

I understood that he only came in here to be with me. He then kissed my cheek and slowly turned me around to face him. I stared in to his eyes that were blue as the sky. Then I felt his lips on mine. I could taste sweetness on them. I missed these lips. A rush of mixed feelings rushed through me, relief that I had him yet again, disbelief that things were fixed so effortlessly, longing because even if I had only lost him for a little while, I missed him and the last feeling was love, I think I do love him.

When I pulled away, I wrapped my arms around his neck and rested my head on his shoulder. I was still angry with him, for leaving me this morning, but I guess he was making up for it. As if reading my thoughts he said to me "I'm sorry about this morning , I really am Katniss" I thought about what to say, maybe I shouldn't be so hard on him, after all , it was because of the aftermath of the tracker jacker venom that had once coursed through his veins. Like he said, he was under the influence of a flash back. "It's okay, I just. You should have told me you were going to have a flash back; I could have helped you or something." I felt him smile against my neck "you're too cute" I felt annoyed at his comment; I don't like to consider myself as 'cute'.

He squeezed me and then let go, gave me one last peck on the lips and told me to put some random cream on his jaw, so Gale doesn't suspect anything. I felt relieved at this actually. I didn't want Gale to consider Peeta and me as a couple. Well not yet anyway. As we strolled back into the living room, Gale eyed us. But then he must have decided everything was all right and stopped. Since it was already about five in the evening, Peeta and I served some bread from this morning with tea for us three, on a tray and he carried it to the living room, where Gale was lighting a fire.

Peeta and I were sitting next to each other on the couch, not to apart but not to close and Gale was seated on the recliner. We were sipping our tea in awkward silence until Peeta spoke up. He probably couldn't stand the silence anymore. "So Gale how's district two?" Peeta asked. "It's fine, the nut is being rebuilt." Gale told Peeta. Peeta looked at him confused and then Gale continued "sorry, the nut is this big mountain and inside was headquarters for the peace keepers and such. Now it's being rebuilt to a lab of sorts, where we'll be creating bombs, weapons, appliances, and you name it. It's nice." "Oh, that's great " said Peeta.

Before I could stop myself I blurted out "How's Johanna?" I swear he blushed a little and then said "fine, she fine. Not so afraid of water anymore, she is slowly regaining confidence with it. She helped me create a nice variety of axes, very deadly. Like her." He smiled when he said the last part and I couldn't help and smile too, I hoped he was happy with her. And I hoped Johanna had finally found someone to love. I glanced at Peeta and he had a faraway look in his eyes. I had a feeling that he was thinking about when he and Johanna were held captives in the capital.

I had to stop him from thinking about these thoughts, so I grabbed his clammy hand. He was jolted back to present day. He looked down at our hands as if not believing it and then smiled. We spent an hour or so catching up and chatting about random things. With every minute, I felt the tense and awkward fog rise. We laughed loads and for a while it felt… Natural. As if we were buddies for a long time, and have always got along great like we were now. Well, Gale and I were friends, best friends. But it was great seeing Peeta and Gale's friendship bloom. I smiled at the thought.

"I have to go soon you know. That hovercraft isn't mine. " Said Gale after our tea had been drunk, fire died out and bread had disappeared. I didn't want him to leave but I understood why. "You'll come back and visit right? You'll bring Johanna with you?" He smiled and promised me he would. "Or maybe, we could visit you and Johanna." Suggested Peeta. "That sounds good" replied Gale. I didn't want to go to district two. I had too many memories there and the majority weren't positive. But I still nodded my head as it agreeing.

Peeta and I walked with Gale to the meadow, were his small borrowed hovercraft was sitting. Gale hugged me a little too tight and for a little too long, but I didn't mind, though Peeta did. I could tell, but he didn't say anything. The boys shook hands and Gale was soon out of sight. We gazed up at the sky, staring at the small speck that was Gale, and we watched it disappear.

The sun was setting. The sun set was so beautiful. "Look" I said signaling at the lovely multicolored sky, "Orange, like a sunset". He didn't say anything, he just smiled and then grabbed my hand and held on to it. After a few moments we were locked in each other's embrace, at first we just were holding each other but then we were kissing. I could be as mad as I wanted to be, but there was no denying his kisses. No turning him down even if I wanted to, the feeling could just take over me. I couldn't say no to Peeta Mellark's soft, sweet lips nor his touch or his kisses. The ones I so craved, the ones no one can grant but him.


	10. Chapter 10

**Hi there(: So here is chapter 10! Enjoy:D. Thank you for all the views and reviews! Reviews are always appreciated. Let me know what you think. **

Chapter 10- Hand in hand

Peeta-

The air was warm and relaxing that night by the fire place. It was just me and Katniss. Alone. Gale had left a few hours ago, after we watched the sun set, ate dinner, and took showers we were here, by the fire. An old movie was playing softly on the TV screen. I was on the couch waiting for Katniss. She had come back from the kitchen, holding two mugs. I smiled at her.

She handed me a mug and I took a sip. As I swallowed the sweet, warm, brown, creamy, liquid I felt a warm sensation spread through my body, it was similar to the one I get when I kiss Katniss. I found it strange that I was comparing Katniss and hot chocolate but they were both such great creations that gave me such great feelings. She took off her slippers and sat next to me, right next to me. Not at all like when Gale was here, I felt her hair brush against my shoulder.

I could smell the sweet jasmine smell coming from her soft, dark hair. I didn't realize I was staring at her until she said, raising and eyebrow, "Is there a problem?" I was staring at her lips, at the perfect form of them, the soft plumpness, and the curve of her chin. "You tell me" I said as I touched under her chin with my finger, pulling her lips gently toward me. I leaned in and kissed her, and the best thing is, that she kissed me back. I could still taste the chocolaty flavor on her tongue as it danced with mine own. We didn't pull away until after a long time.

She then set our empty mugs on the coffee table and snuggled up against my side, her arms wrapped loosely around my neck. "You have no idea how much I missed you" she confessed to me. "I missed you more than you did me" she shook her head against my neck. "We haven't been like this since ..." I was interrupted by Katniss saying "the nights on the train, the victor's tour, and the quarter quell". "Uh yeah, exactly" I said. I was surprised she remembered it so quickly. "Those were some of the only nights I could actually sleep" she told me. "Wait, what so you mean by 'this'? " she asked.

I replied saying "being able to enjoy each other's company in peace. We are able to be together because we want to..." I looked at her before continuing "you want to right?" She nodded and said "of course Peeta." I smiled and continued "we can be ourselves, together. Do you know what I mean?" "Mmhm" she mumbled. "Katniss?" She looked up at me and said "yes, Peeta?" Oh how I love her gray eyes.

I leaned down and kissed the tip of her nose. I was afraid about what I was going to say next but the question had been stuck in my mind, nagging at me all day. I took a deep breath, scared of what her answer might be and asked "You love me. Real or not real?" I waited a couple seconds before looking down at her. When I did, she had her eye brows raised and a cocky grin on her lips. "Are you joking?"

I shook my head. I tried to hold in my tears. After a few moments she said "Real, real, and very real. You don't need to ask me that." She finished her sentence with grasping my face with both hands, one on each side and kissing me. I felt a tear roll down my cheek until it got lost in our locked lips. I smiled while she kissed me, and she did to. "I love you Katniss." I said in between kisses. She replied by lacing her fingers with mine. Then, a memory I forgot I had, surfaced, it was of us before the quarter quell, we were on the roof of the training center where we were staying. I remembered how I had wanted to live in that memory for ever.

It seemed so long ago. After a long time, I laid down on the same couch and she snuggled up against me, the couch was actually, pretty large, so we both could fit comfortably if we were close together, which was no problem. Then, to my surprise, since this event coming from her was so rare, she started to sing. I wrapped my arm around her and squeezed her gently. I knew how this song ended so I sang the last verse with her when she got to it "this is the place , where I love you " she then kissed me one more time, rested one hand and her head on my chest and fell asleep.

I kissed her forehead before closing my eyes and falling asleep myself. That night there were no nightmares. No nightmares at all. Just a blissful, dreamless slumber. It was very satisfying. When I woke up the next day, I woke up to a pair of grey eyes staring up at me. She had probably been up for a while now. I smiled at her, kissed her, and said "good morning beautiful". She pecked my lips and said "good morning Peeta". I glanced at the clock above the fire place. It was quarter to eleven.

I had never slept that late since I've been here. "Want to go have breakfast?" I asked and she nodded, then got up and then stuck out her hands so I could use them as support to get up to my feet. I washed my face and brushed my teeth in the bathroom before heading to the kitchen. There was some bread from yesterday, it was a little hard but it was good enough since we dunk pieces of it in hot chocolate.

After breakfast she accompanied me out side to tend my garden even though there wasn't much to do. We did agree though that we would soon add some primrose bushes to the flower beds in honor of Prim. Katniss was pretty glad when I agree to it. I also asked her if she would like some primroses on her front lawn and she did. While she had her gaze fixed upon Haymitch's house, she told me that she felt like she had to talk to Haymitch soon and apologize to him, I nodded in agreement.

After we were done with the garden we headed in side to start planning lunch. Katniss wanted to eat salad and then have pumpkin and turkey soup for dinner. When we were discussing about how we didn't have any pumpkins, I suddenly remembered about Navy and how we had promised to meet up. "I'll go buy some at the market; I have to meet up with a friend there anyways, so I'll go." I told her. "Who? What friend?" she asked me.

"Navy, her name is Navy." I replied "how do you know her?" She asked with a slight touch of jealousy in her voice. "Well, I know her from the market and yesterday when I was in the woods, I ran in to her and we sort of became friends." Katniss raised an eyebrow at me. "That quickly? Okay... And?" She urged. "And we talked about a lot of things yesterday" "what did you talk about?" she asked "about everything basically." I said. "What? You can't just go around telling strangers about your life Peeta!" she yelled at me.

I started to get angry since it's really none of her business who I talked to and what I talked about. "Why do you care who I talk to?" I asked loudly. "Why do I care? Because your, my ...my-" she paused and then simply said "friend." I had a feeling she wanted to say another word but she didn't because well, I wasn't that word. We weren't anything official. Well we were engaged, married even but that didn't count. We weren't anything but friends on our terms. I hadn't really thought about it.

Suddenly the anger disappeared, and was replaced by longing. I really wanted Katniss to be more than a friend and I knew I had to be the one to ask, but I figured now was not the time to ask her. "Katniss, I was feeling lonely and really sad, I needed someone to talk to, and she told me I could trust her. I didn't have anyone to run to! I don't have family or friends! I don't even trust Haymitch. I have no one but you. I don't have a best friend that's willing to fly in from a long away district to come and comfort me. I think I finally found a friend that's not you and I need you to understand that okay? I would really appreciate if you didn't get angry. Anyways, how do you make friends if you don't talk to strangers? She seems really nice and trust worthy."

Her face changed from a scowl to glaring to just staring as I talked. She nodded and then said nothing. I felt that she understood me, since she must have needed someone too, because Gale did fly in. I asked her if she wanted to come with me to the market and she told me she did. Around twelve fifteen, we were making our way down the path to the town square. Katniss hadn't seen it being rebuilt yet so she was sort of excited, but I could see in her eyes she was upset. I guess she was thinking about all the people who had died and what this district looked like before the bombing.

I squeezed her hand to let her know that I was there. "Be strong" I whispered to her as the square came in to view. Katniss looked up at me, eyes glistening with tears. I hugged her and ran my fingers through her hair and told her it's okay as she released some of them. She recovered quite quickly. After, with our hands intertwined we headed to the market were Navy was at. I could tell Katniss didn't really want to see her but she greeted her politely any ways.

We chatted a little while and then I bought a small squash instead of pumpkin, a small plant of lettuce, a couple large potatoes and some herbs from Navy. After a quick hug from Navy, which made Katniss grit her teeth, and our good byes we left. Even though I knew she was annoyed we walked up the path to her house hand in hand, I would rob kisses from her and that would make her smile. I would tell her things like "you're really pretty when you're annoyed. Did you know that?" And that would make her blush. This was so lovely and just like I always wanted it to be.


	11. Chapter 11

**Hello(: Hope you like this chapter! Let me know what you think by reviewing! Thanks for all the views! :D. **

**Chapter 11- Buttercup **

**Katniss-**

It's been a week since Peeta has practically been living at my house. It's been a week since Gale came and went. It's been a week, and I felt alive again.

We were lying in bed when he asked me, "you should ask for permission to go in to the woods". I looked at my right to stare into those beautiful blue eyes. "You think so?" I questioned. "Yeah, I do. I mean, first of all the woods are like therapy, they calm you in every way, and second, I wouldn't mind eating fresh game once in a while." I smiled at his comment. It was true though, fresh game sounded delicious. Last week I couldn't eat turkey since I couldn't hunt and the butcher's hadn't been completely rebuilt. The only meat we had was the one supplied by the capital for Peeta, and that was all frozen to be kept preserved and we had finished it last week.

I finally nodded in approval and said "you're going to have to help me convince my doctor that I can handle a bow." "No problem." He said before giving me a light peck on the lips. We then got up and headed to make a call all the way to the capital. With Peeta's smooth words and a little of my pouting, my request was approved, but with the condition that I had to go meet a team of doctors sent from the capital that evening, and that's exactly what I did. Peeta had tagged along with me at about 6 o'clock to go to the train station were the medics would be arriving.

After waiting for a long time we were about to go home to have supper, when we heard the rumble of the train approaching. Out of the train stepped a group of three people, two women and one man. "Hello Katniss, hello Peeta". They said to us in a bright capital accent in union. We smiled awkwardly at them and said hello also. They introduced themselves to us. The woman with dark straight hair with half of it shaved off was named Quinn, the man with the ginger hair and ears full of earrings was called Casper, and lastly the plump girl with the Blonde curly hair and bright pink lipstick was named Beatrice.

They gestured us into the train where they had a little station set up. They laid me down on a stretcher and did a couple tests on me, they monitored my vital signs and reminded me to take my pills, the ones that they later restocked me on. They monitored Peeta as well and gave him his corresponding medicine. After filling out their reports for my doctor they handed me a new black game bag, and two bows. The one Beetee had created for me, and my old one.

I had tears of joy as I grasped the weapon created by my father's hands, I felt like I once again had a part of him. I wondered how they got their hands on this bow since last I knew, it was in district thirteen, but I guess it doesn't matter; I had them in my hands once more. Peeta carried the sheath of arrows for me, none explosive or fire, just regular old arrows. The crew's last gift was to Peeta, a bag full of who knows what, he refused to open it until we got home, but I could hear some clinking metal so I figured it's probably baking supplies. "That's a gift from Plutarch" they told him as they handed him the sack. "Tell him I said thanks" he said.

When we arrived at my house it was too late for going hunting, so we decided to get started on dinner. As the vegetable stew was cooking, Peeta dumped the content of his bag on the dining table and called me over to see. I was right, they were baking supplies. Peeta's expression was priceless, he was so glad that he hugged me right after I approached the table. There was everything a baker could want, from cookie cutters to whisks. Dyes of every color and essences used to flavor food of every flavor, from citrus to vanilla.

It even brought a deep circular tray to bake cakes in. Peeta was ecstatic. He would have baked the night away if I would have let him. That night we slept with full bellies, and were warm since we were wrapped in each other's arms.

That morning I woke up to Peeta screaming in the living room downstairs. I got out of bed as quickly as I could and I flew down the stairs. I found him walking around a chair, with his hands twitching at his side. Peeta always wakes up earlier than me. I could smell bread baking in the oven; if Peeta wasn't acting so strange I would have been tempted to sneak a peek at the delicacies in the oven. "Katniss" he said in a low growl.

I had to admit, I was terrified when he got like this, because I'm not sure what to expect, and I don't have a clue about what I'm supposed to do. I turned right around and headed to the bathroom to get his pills. When I returned he was gripping the chair so tightly his knuckles were losing color, and turning white. I slipped the capsule in my pocket and slowly approached him. "Peeta?" I said softly. He looked up at me, his pupils dilated and said "go away you mutt, you liar, you horrible creature!" I tried hard not to weep, and just sunk to the floor against the nearest wall, watching him suffer, watching him fight with his own mind, and knowing I couldn't do anything made tears roll down my cheeks.

My feelings of disgust towards the capital were once again revived 'look at what they did to him!' I thought to myself. I sat there and waited for this to pass. I know he didn't mean to call me a mutt, but it still hurt coming from his lips. After a while he too had sunk to the ground, and we both sat there, he stared at the ceiling and I stared at him, tear after tear streaking my face. When he came to, he finally registered me, silently sobbing a couple yards away from him. He immediately made his way towards me saying "Katniss, Katniss, what happened?"

As he sat down next to me I had the sensation to run away from him. As his hands made their way to brush my tears away, I flinched. I swear I didn't mean to, but the effect was immediately reflected upon Peeta's face. He looked miserable and asked me if he had attacked me or something and I reassured him he didn't. "What did I say then?" He asked and in between sobs I told him that he called me a mutt. He looked terribly sorry and hugged me until I calmed down. Memories of our past flashed in my mind, and I could feel his hands around my neck. After I stopped crying, Peeta got up and took the bread out of the oven, they were a little too dark but they weren't burnt.

Peeta tried everything to cheer me up, and eventually I stared joking around with him. "Hey, how about we have breakfast in the woods? How does that sound?" He was so cheerful, comparing him to me; you would have thought I had had the episode. "Okay" I said softly since I was okay, but I was still a little shaken up. We packed up our breakfast and we were out the door, hand in hand, as if nothing had happened.

We were under a huge pine when he handed me a cheese bun, my favorite. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry about what I said to you this morning I-" I interrupted him by saying "I know you didn't me to. I'm sorry for acting this way." For some strange reason his apology made me feel better. I was fine. After finishing our breakfast I said "hey, I want to show you something." After wrapping up everything I got up, helped him up and I guided him towards the lake, and the worn down house. I rested our picnic basket in a rock near the shore of the lake when he grabbed my waist, turned me right around and kissed me.

We stood there a long while, kissing, under the warm sunlight, listening to the birds sing their sweet songs. I felt like I was living a pleasant dream. After chasing each other around in the lake like small children for a while, we went towards the old house to light a fire so we could dry up before returning to my house. As I started pushing logs into the fire place I heard a sharp hiss come from the inside of the gap. I moved the logs aside and in the darkness I stared in to a pair of yellow eyes. Familiar bright yellow eyes. Buttercup. "Stupid cat" I muttered to it as I pulled it out. He was matted, smelled horrible and was very filthy. He hissed at me after I plopped him on the ground next to me. I suddenly felt miserable all over again. I crouched right next to him and said softly "Prim isn't at home anymore. Coin killed her. She's dead." The cat stared at my tears as they fell. I think he understood something since his misshapen ears perked up at the sound of her name.

"I miss her too" I told Buttercup. I wanted to fix this cat up, clean him, and bring him home, only because that's what Prim would have wanted. Peeta came in with an armful of logs and took a look at me then at buttercup and didn't ask any questions. And I was grateful. That evening he helped me pamper buttercup up. We even tied Prim's old ribbon around his neck. The cat wasn't too happy, but he made himself comfortable next to the fire place. "Thanks Peeta" I said as we sat on the couch once more.

I could feel his warmth as I rested my body against his side. I wrapped my arms around his neck. "For what?" He asked. I felt his chest vibrate as he said that. "For not leaving me" I reached up and kissed him. "For being there with your warm arms ready to embrace me when I sobbing my heart out" I placed another kiss on his soft lips. "I know I'm a handful. But thank you for staying with me" he kissed me and then said "Always Katniss, Always"


	12. Chapter 12

**Hello there(: Here is chapter 12 :D. Hope you like it! Let me know what you think. **

Chapter 12- Making memories.

Peeta-

Days passed, and I could feel my relationship with Katniss develop. We made a sort of routine. Every day we would wake up at around nine thirty, this took me a while to adapt to since I was used to waking up around seven. We would have breakfast, go for a walk, spend time outside, have lunch and then head towards the town square, to see if we could help out with anything. We so far have helped build a couple houses and a few shops.

We also got to see who has come back to district twelve and it was great to see more than three hundred adults and children were back here. I decided I would purchase the bakery, and run it myself. It's not done yet since it needs painting on the inside and out, and I need to figure out what furniture I want. Katniss doesn't always help me at the bakery, so she'll wander around twelve seeing where she is needed. The butcher's shop has been rebuilt completely, so Katniss is co-working with them, she'll hunt and trade the game for money. She's quite happy with her job. At around six thirty in the evening we would go back to Katniss's house, where we have dinner and then watch TV with Buttercup near the fireplace.

One day when we were about to sit down and relax, we heard a knock on the door. I got up and went to see who it was and I found myself face to face with a pair of green eyes ; Navy. "Hey Peeta!" She said as she made her way inside. Navy has been coming here a lot lately, she and Katniss are actually getting along now; I'd say they're even becoming friends. So after Navy stepped inside I realized she had something in her hands. "What's that?" I asked signaling to the box she had in her grasp, as I followed her towards the living room. "Something" she told me.

"Hi Katniss" Navy said as Katniss got up from the couch to greet her with a hug. "Hello there Navy." I just love seeing them get along. After we all had mugs of hot chocolate in our hands, and were situated around the fire, Navy spoke up "Okay, so, I was browsing at the new library, and I came across this remarkable sketch book, and the pages are blank and I decided you guys had to have it" she then handed the box to Katniss who was nearest to her. Katniss and I were on the sofa and Navy was on the recliner.

Katniss opened the lid and I tore away the wrapping paper. Inside was a large sketch book, the top was cream colored with miniature swirl designs at the borders. We both looked at each other speechless, but then smiled at Navy and said our thanks. She seemed quite pleased with herself. After watching some interviews by Ceaser Flickerman, Navy, went home. As I was climbing in bed that night I asked Katniss what she thought about Navy's gift. She paused for a moment and said "I don't know really. What do you want to do with it?" "Well-." I stared but then she interrupted "I know!" She said slamming her hand on the bed. "Let's make a memory book."

I looked at her and raised an eyebrow uncomprehending what she meant. "A memory book Peeta! Where we can honor and remember everyone who died. We can add Prim, Finnick, Rue, and Wiress" and she continued listing people, and I couldn't help feeling horrible. "My family" I said and she nodded. I started to get those bad feelings again so I asked if she could bring me my pills. Then she reached her hand in her drawer and pulled out a container that kept the small capsules, and an unopened water bottle. I had no time to question her so I just took the damn thing and closed my eyes while I rested my head against the head board of the bed.

When she took my hand I got goose bumps. She held on to it the entire time and it was pleasant because I had something to keep me anchored to the real world, something that makes me want to stay sane. The episode came and went quite quickly. When my thoughts were clearing up I glanced at Katniss and her eyes were slowly closing and then opening quickly, repeatedly. She was trying hard not to fall asleep. "You can sleep you know, I'm pretty sure I'm not going to kill you while you're doing so." She looked up at me and I saw a glint of alarm in her eyes.

I hated that, I don't want her to be scared of me, because it makes me feel like a monster, a beast that's going hurt her, and I don't want that. "Hey, don't be afraid Katniss, really, I need you to trust me not fear me." With that she kissed me, cuddled up against me and fell asleep. I hoped this meant she trusted me, it sure felt like it. I played with her hair for a while and thought about the book, and about how it was a really great idea Katniss had. I could draw the aspects and Katniss could write a little description about that person. I had a feeling that the book is going to be harder to make than it seems.

Katniss will probably cry, but I on the other hand have to try to keep myself calm. I fell asleep to the memory of us retouching Katniss' family book about edible plants and herbs and plants with medical uses.

The next morning after breakfast we got right to creating it.

The first page read, in Katniss neat cursive letters,

Our Memory Book

And under

This book belongs to Katniss Everdeen and Peeta Mellark.

And after that the date. I smiled at the sight if our names together. I fought the urge of acting like a 14 year old girl and drawing a heart around our names. The first page was dedicated to Prim and only Prim. I drew her pale skin, her blue eyes, and her soft blond hair. I colored her pink cheeks and lips to perfection. When I was finished, Katniss stroked her paper cheek longingly. I wrapped an arm around her and kissed her cheek.

She didn't cry though, she just had a very unhappy look in her eyes. I then moved on to drawing Cinna and his gold eyeliner that matched the gold flecks in his green eyes. After that, I drew Finnick, with his see green eyes and handsome features. We stopped there though. Katniss and I were both weeping by then but we found comfort in each other's arms. It took all my will power to keep myself under control for Katniss's sake. She was in no condition to have to deal with me losing my sense. Katniss wrote some very sweet things about these people, she wrote about their best qualities, talents and even her favorite thing about them. I just couldn't help thinking about why bad things happen to such good people. Why them? What did they do wrong? Nothing. Absolutely nothing.

Finnick left an unborn child fatherless. Cinna's death was the world's loss, to lose such pure talent, creativity and kindness, and Prim, Prim left a sister who loved her, alone, with an empty feeling I think no one will ever be able to fill. Primrose had her whole life ahead of her. My family left me alone also. Death was very cruel, but I guess we just have to learn to deal with it.

"Let's go for a walk." I suggested after wrapping the book back in its box. Katniss nodded and took my hand as she got up. Hand in hand we made our way to the woods once again. We sat under a pine side by side, staring in to nothingness, not speaking to each other. That's when Katniss's hand crawled towards mine and laced her fingers with my own. "We're all we have." She told me. I tried to find her eyes but she wouldn't let me. "We've got each other." I said in agreement.

That's when we probably both realized how very on your own we are in this terrifying world. Just a pair of kids, some would say. It was true though. I have her and she has me. That's it. No one else, no Navy, no Gale. Us. "I miss them Peeta" she said to me as she scooted in to my arms. She sat in front of me as I wrapped my arms around her and let my hands rest in her lap. She leaned against me and I instantly felt all right, as sadness, guilt, and anger was drained out of my body. "Katniss?" I said. "Yeah." She said in response.

I knew it wasn't at all the right time to ask, but I had a tiny voice in the back of my head saying it was. "I love you, I'm sure you know that." She turned her head to look at me, raised an eyebrow and nodded. I stared in to her grey eyes as I recited the next question "well, I wanted to know, if you wanted to... Be my girlfriend, like, for real, on our own terms. Do you?" She signed and smiled a cocky smile. "It took you long enough" she said. That's when our lips met and it felt just right.


	13. Chapter 13

**Hello(: I am SO sorry for not updating sooner! Hope you like this chapter. Review please! I'd appreciate it. **

Chapter 13- The letter.

Katniss-

"It's just a little while Peeta!" I yelled up the upstairs to him. "Wait one second. I'll go with you Katniss; I don't want you to go alone!" He yelled back. He then appeared at the start of the stairs and swiftly made his way down. "I'm not five, and you're not my father. I am capable of going unaccompanied! He isn't going to do anything to me! It's just Haymitch." I said crossing my arms. Then he was in front of me, staring directly in to my eyes. "I may not be you're father but I am you're boyfriend, and that means I have to take care of you." He then smiled from ear to ear, and I tried not to also, but I failed.

I wanted to tell him to leave me alone but instead, I said "I'm the one who screwed everything up. I have to apologize. I am sure he isn't going to attack me, he's not like y-" I stopped when I saw he frowned and immediately regretted what I had said. "Never mind. I'll be right back okay?" I kissed him and I then barged past him as he said "Just be careful." and then I was out the door.

I walked across the street to Haymitch's house. I didn't understand why Peeta was being so overprotective, as if Haymitch was like an untamed, wild beast or something. I knocked on Haymitch's door and waited.

Nothing.

So I just marched right in. The house was neat all in all, but still had a few liquor bottles on the floor. "Haymitch?" I said loudly. 'If he just came out of his cave and showed himself it would so much easier' I thought. Then I found him in his bedroom sleeping with the usual knife clutched in his hand. A bottle of a light brown liquid sat half full on his night stand. "Haymitch" I said softly. "Haymitch" I said a bit louder now. He stirred in his sleep but didn't wake. Finally, I dumped a small bucket of warm water I retrieved from the bathroom on his face, impatiently. He got up immediately. Eyes wide, he threw his knife in my direction. It grazed my shoulder before I could dodge it. I yelped in pain, while Haymitch stared at me confused. "Katniss?" He wondered out loud. "Indeed." I confirmed. After a few moments he asked coldly "what do you want?"  
"I wanted to talk to you...about something." I told him  
"What?" he questioned.  
"Well, first that I'm sorry. I feel remorseful. I really regret saying those awful things to you." I confessed.  
He grunted.  
"I shouldn't have said that about your relationships. It was so rude and unnecessary. Just... Sorry." I finished. His gray eyes bore in to mine, which made me feel a bit uncomfortable. He then grunted again and rolled over on his side. "That's it? Say something at least. Do you forgive me?" "Mhm." He mumbled. He then sat up and with a cold, melancholy expression on his face said "Let me just tell you one thing sweet heart. You have No idea what it is, to lose someone to the capital. To see them die because of you. Because you gave it your best shot at surviving. You don't know how guilty I feel every time I remember her name, or my mother's or my sisters'. Okay? Oh and last thing I didn't mean for you and Peeta to fight, forgive me for that." I, a little annoyed, told him I wouldn't and then said "What was her name?"

Haymitch then answered half heartily "Evelyn Ledendecker, she was about 5' 4'' with blond hair and gray eyes." I nodded and then did something I or he wasn't even expecting. I embraced him, and he actually hugged me back. "I'm so sorry; I promise I won't say anything about them ever again." He rolled his eyes but accepted my apology. He then accompanied me down stairs to the front of his house. Just as he was about to close the wooden door on me a said "you know you have us now right? Just keep that in mind." He nodded, smiled, and finished closing the entrence. I stared at the front of his house, thinking about what would have happened to me if I would have gone through his experiences. I shuddered at the thought of Prim, my mother, Gale and even Peeta being murdered because of me. Would I have been as strong as Haymitch?

I then made my way home and back in to Peeta's arms right where I belonged.

I opened the front door with such force it slammed against the wall. I heard some shuffle of feet in the kitchen and then I saw Peeta, apron in hand, sprinting towards the door to investigate the noise. I literally jump into his arms and kissed him full on the mouth. When we pulled away, his stunning blue eyes were staring at me, confused. "I'm so glad I have you." I told him. He softened and then held me close. Before pulling away, he stiffened, then stood up straight and drew his arm out before him. I saw blood on his bicep and then realized he had found out about my slash from Haymitch's knife. "Katniss..." He starts, but immediately, I say "I was an accident okay? He didn't mean to..." "Let's go talk to him…okay?" and then I was following him out the door once more.

Haymitch was watching TV when Peeta found him. "Did you see what you did to her?" he yelled at Haymitch once he got near him. "Well hello there, yeah I'm fine, how about you?" Haymitch said calmly, not tearing his eyes away from the television. "I'm not joking around!" Peeta said with the same loud tone he used before. "Okay, what? The cut? She'll be fine. Plus… she deserved it." Haymitch stated. I couldn't believe what I was hearing. At this rate I am going to have my hands full, because or they're either going to fight or Peeta is sure to have an episode, since very strong emotions trigger them.

As if on cue, Peeta took Haymitch by the collar and pulled him up on to his feet. I could see the glint of Haymitch's knife in his hands as he pulled it out. Peeta could strangle him, but Haymitch can stab Peeta right in the stomach. "Wait! Hold it!" I screamed at them. They didn't even budge at my words. "I didn't mean to throw a knife at her!" Haymitch bellowed right in to Peeta's face. "How can I trust you? When you've lied to me so many times?" Peeta asked in response. I began to get the feeling that maybe, I, wasn't the only topic Peeta wanted to clear with Haymitch.

Haymitch smirked before saying. "You still have bitter feelings about the arena don't you? You're upset because I saved Katniss once again. Well, listen here. I meant to save all of you; got it? And, I did, in the end, but Katniss was more important to the cause than you in that moment." Peeta became quiet, but still had a firm grip on Haymitch. I felt my face flush, I hated talking about this. I didn't want Peeta thinking he was unimportant, because truth is, he would have been a much better mockingjay.

"I trusted you Haymitch, I was tortured because of you're injudicious plan. If Katniss hadn't lost the will to move on without me, you would have never approved of the rescue mission to find us." Peeta spat. "Well, I'm sorry you think that, but you've got it all wrong. I cared about you and still do. _Sorry_ about everything" Haymitch said.  
It was odd hearing Haymitch be so…_affectionate_, so…_loving,_ towards anybody. So, I concluded, that he was doing it to get Peeta off his back, or front in this case.

Peeta eyes softened as if this was exactly what he wanted to hear and took a step back, letting go of Haymitch. I raised an eyebrow at this man's cleverness. Peeta struck out his hand and then they shook. "I still don't trust you fully." Peeta let him know. Haymitch shrugged at this and went back to watching television as if nothing had happened.

Well that was easy.

I, still in disbelief at what just happened, was dragged away, back home.

Wrapped in his arms that night, I asked him if he was going to be on good terms with Haymitch. I told him about how he really did care about him, and how it had surprised me that Haymitch had told him so.

"It seems unreal the way we fixed everything up. I know Haymitch probably said those things just to calm me, but the fact that he said them, to me, means he wants to fix things." He told me. I nodded at his theory, and then felt his soft lips against my forehead and then drifted off to what I hoped would be a dreamless sleep.

The next morning I helped Peeta make soft honey oat loaves. The result ended with us and the kitchen all covered in flour and some deformed little lumps on a tray.

I had dropped the sack of flour and it had smashed on the floor creating a fog of the very stuff. I had to kiss him before he got too angry. Just as I was ordered to fetch the broom, which was located near the front door, I saw a letter slip in from under the door. I grasped the blue envelope in my hands and read the address. It was from the new president of Panem. "Paylor…" I whispered.

When I read the letter it held inside I didn't really know what to do. "Peeta!" I called. Once he was beside me and had read the document he looked curiously at me. "So? What are you going to do?" I took a deep breath and said "Well, I'm not going alone. _We're_ going back to the capital."


	14. Chapter 14

**Hello****beautiful****people! Here is chapter 14 :D. I hope you like it! Let me know by reviewing :D. Thank you so much for all the views :'). Sorry it took so long :s. **

**Chapter 14-Their legacy. **

**Peeta-**

"I really don't want to do this Peeta." She says to me, eyes watering. I gently push Buttercup off my lap and go over to the wall where she was seated, hugging her knees. "Katniss, you think I do? I thought I was ready to move on and remember the deaths peacefully." I said, then giving her a small kiss on her forehead.

As I cradled her in my arms I thought that going to the Capital for a huge commemorative ceremony in honor of the fallen, will just make us re-live the losses, make them feel heart-breaking and real all over again. "We have to do this though, for them."

I nodded after she said this. "For Prim, your family, and our old friends." I nodded once again. "Peeta? How are you going to control your...you know...episodes? I mean, they have been coming less frequently, fortunately, but still, I worry." I didn't really know what to say. I haven't even thought about it. I smiled and said playfully "I'll have to have my pills with me at all times, and I'm going to need my helper also."

I squeezed her side and she smiled. I called her my helper because she always holds me to reality when I go under the influence of my moments of insanity. She is always there, giving me my capsules, sitting me down, keeping me from collapsing. She is no longer afraid of me. Well, at least isn't as afraid as she used to be.

She's a strong woman, and has my full and utter most complete trust.

"Oh, Yeah?" She said, her lips inches from mine. "Mhm." I could feel the heat of her lips close to mine, almost touching. "Or, we can just knock you out during the whole thing." She smiled and pulled away. I find it endearing and terribly annoying when she teases me like this. I eyed her, as she moved a loose strand of silky, brown hair behind her ear. "You're beautiful, you know that right?" Her sparkling grey eyes bore into mine.

I grabbed her delicate face with both hands and held her as I kissed her soft lips.

"Hey Katniss, Paylor just called and wants us to-." I started, as I opened the door to the bathroom where I knew she was. "Peeta!" She shrieked as she quickly wrapped a towel around herself. "Whoa, sorry, I didn't know you were going to-." "Take a shower! Yes! Get out!"

Her aggressiveness shocked me so I left immediately. She always got this way when she was in the bathroom or more specific when she was… undressed. I was almost certain it was because of the scars on her back. That's why she never believes me when I tell her that she's gorgeous. "I don't know why you hide them so much, I have the same marks." I said to her from behind the door.

"Just go Peeta." She said still angry but softer. I sighed and made my way to my room to start packing.

We were formally invited to attend the ceremony in memory of the departed, which will be broadcasted to the whole country, held three days from now. However, Katniss and I are part of the opening speeches, so we will part for the Capital today evening, so we can help with the preparations and rehearse what we are to say.

It's not obligatorily of course, but we both feel it's our duty. It's the right thing to do. Not to mention that Panem will be highly disappointed if we didn't show up. We will be in the Capital for a whole week approximately, since we will undoubtedly stay until a couple days after the event, just until everything is cleared up, and we are able to travel back home in peace.

So, we must pack a lot of clothes. Just as I was packing some sweaters, Katniss came into the room dressed, but with a towel wrapping her coffee-colored hair. "I miss Cinna, Peeta." She told me. "He would be dressing me up for these types of things." She continued. "I miss Portia." I said. She faced me and then grimaced as if just remembering that Portia, like Cinna, was gone.

I sighed and proceeded in folding and stuffing my suitcase. "Do you think it's very changed?" she asked. "What? The Capital? Not really. We're still going to find the ridiculous outfits and houses. Snow isn't going to be there though, and like here, there aren't any more peacekeepers. That's a start, I guess." I supposed.

She nodded and pursed her lips. "Peeta." She said sweetly. I raised an eyebrow and waited for her to continue. She came closer and tangled her fingers in my hair. "Do you mind packing for me?" I chuckled. I knew she wanted something, she isn't usually this affectionate. "What do I get in return?" I asked. She kissed me tenderly and then hugged me snugly. "Nothing." She told me. "No, but I can help you." I offered. "I wanted to go see Haymitch and check how he was getting along." She said. "I'm not packing for you, you pack and then you can go." I said before she scowled at me.

Truth was that I didn't want her to leave, and much less go to Haymitch's house. "You have to stop loathing him so much. It's going to be like old times again you want it or not. Us three, on our way to the Capital, just like before." She scolded me. "Sorry I can't trust him, Katniss." I said in an irritated tone.

"Why do you care so much about him after all?" I asked. "Because. We're all he's got, if you didn't notice. We've been through a lot, Peeta. Why should I be so unforgiving like you? It's all good and done." She said.

"Katniss I-." I began. "I just want you guys to get along. Do it for me, Peeta." I rolled my eyes and promised I would, for her. I guess she was right, but I just didn't want to admit it. I wanted to forgive him, but I couldn't make myself do it, not yet anyway. Though in the end, I have to get along, since we have this ceremony to take part in.

When I finished packing my things I sat, legs spread out on the bed, with my back to the head board, as I watched Katniss pick out clothes, fold them, and put them in her suit case. "You should take some dresses." I suggested. "You know I hate them." She replied. "I know but, you should." I said. She glared and me, so I blew a kiss at her. I saw a smile flicker on her lips, and she then sighed and stuck out her hand. "Come help me then." I clutched her warm fingers and she helped me up.

Katniss led me to room that once belonged to Prim. I could tell by the powder and ash on the furniture and hard-wood floor that nobody, not even Katniss, has been in here since Prim's passing, or even, since the bombing. It's just too painful to come in here, mainly for Katniss.

"Peeta, there are some boxes on the stop shelf of the closet, can you get them down for me?" I did as she asked, and laid the three huge boxes in the center of the room. We got down on our knees upon the dusty floor. I watched as she gingerly parted the flaps on top of the first box. "No…" she muttered and pushed the container away. I didn't understand why, so I looked inside of it. The box held gloves, hats, scarves, and coats and about every accessory associated to a winter's outfit.

I picked up a sweater woven from green, blue and gray strands of soft wool. I remembered this piece. "Hey I recognize this" I told Katniss. She glanced over and nodded. "You used this the first day of the victory tour." I recalled. She smiled and said "Yes, Cinna fashioned that." I became silent. She had once pretended to design attires as part of her talent. Flickers of my creations flashed in my mind.

My talent had been painting, and just then, had I realized I hadn't painted in such a long time. Canvases still rested covered in dust, blank and lifeless at my house.

I put the sweater back in its container and observed Katniss. Her hand was digging in the last box. After a few seconds she pulled out a gorgeous orange frock patterned with autumn leaves. "Remember this one?" she said with a glint of sadness in her voice.

I nodded and smiled half-heartedly. "I can't believe how such lovely creations can hold numerous, unhappy memories." I noted. "District eleven." She murmured.

She decided on taking a silk white and black gown she had worn in district two, and a pretty, short, but elegant, pastel rosy- pink dress. Katniss had also taken a couple of other things I didn't pay much attention to. "I'll have to get them ironed once we're there" she told me as she zipped up her suit case. I agreed. The dresses have been neatly folded and all, but they still got wrinkled.

I was glad Katniss had finally finished preparing. I had to just finish loading my pack, and I too, was done. I ran my fingers along one of the many suits, made by, in my opinion, one of the most ingenious designers to ever walk this earth; I had worn on the tour so many months before.

We were carrying our suitcases down stairs, when the clock struck four in the evening. In exactly forty-five minutes, the train arriving from the Capital will be making its way to the station, to collect us.

"Katniss!" I called about ten minutes later. I heard something bump in to the wall in the other room and I want to go investigate what it was. It was my girlfriend. She was chasing Buttercup about the room. "What are you doing?" I asked. "I was meaning to take him to Greasy Sae you know, so she takes care of him, but on second thought, the stupid cat can do just fine on his own. I'll just leave a window open or something." I laughed and seized her hand and lead her out of the room.

Once we finished locking up the house, I waited for Katniss outside Haymitch's door. She had gone in to check on him and hurry up the process if necessary. I guess it was required. I heard a lot of feet shuffling and then an annoyed-looking Haymitch burst out the front door.

"Peeta." He said in greeting, and I nodded in response. After him, came Katniss, clutching a suit case that had clearly been hastily assembled ten minutes ago, since it had a sleeve hanging out. I smirked and she made a face at me. Since Haymitch had not even bothered, or was too drunk to remember, to carry his luggage, Katniss was burdened with it. I immediately took it from her, though. She could barely lug her belongings around I didn't want her struggling with foreign suitcases that didn't belong to her. I huffed in annoyance at Haymitch.

Katniss laced her fingers in mine and we trailed behind the man that, once upon a time, was out mentor. We had just strolled in when the train had screech to a stop. I felt Katniss' grip on my fingers tighten. I squeezed them to let her know I was there and to tell her that everything was going to be alright. Was it really though? All this was very overwhelming.

Katniss, Haymitch and I were situated right in front of the train doors. I was really starting to get nervous though, I felt like my insides were twisting together. I swear I was going to be sick.

I could feel sweat on my forehead, and it was strange because it was chilly outside, since we were in early November. When the doors opened, a bright green wig exposed its self. I wide emerald-colored smile beamed at us. 'Not now…' I thought to myself. 'Not now please…'

"Peeta! Katniss!" I heard a high-pitched, Capital-infused voice call.

Katniss made the mistake of letting go of me, and lurched forward to embrace the lime colored woman. I started to get very light-headed and awful images flashed in my mind.

"Effie." was the only thing I could make out before I, once again, lost consciousness.


	15. Chapter 15

**Hello. I'm SO sorry I haven't posted in a long time, but here is chapter 15! I hope you like it and reviews are appreciated. Let me know what you think! **(:

Chapter 15- Train ride.

Katniss-

The embrace was uncomfortable, for I had received a mouth full of pink hair and her outfit was so puffy, I could barely get my arms around her. But it felt more than great; it felt familiar and it sent a warm feeling through my body. "Oh Effie!" I cried. She pulled away after a few moments and started to say "Oh, it's so nice to see you Kat..." before she let out a gasp and covered her mouth with her hands. I raised an eyebrow, mystified. That's when I didn't feel Peeta's fingers interlocked with my own and I spun around on my heel.

Peeta was on the floor, legs sprawled out and several women I didn't know were surrounding him. I felt a pang of annoyance towards them, and rushed to his side. Just as I was going to crouch down, I heard a smack, and a man that was kneeling trying to lift Peeta up, recoiled. I groaned.

Peeta was having a violent episode.

He usually just sat still, mumbling, shaking and his eyes usually stared out into space. He had punched a man just now, so I knew I had to get all these people away from him. "Ladies! Step back! I can handle this!" I yelled over their alarmed voices. Some did so, but I had to shoo the rest of them away. I knelt down and took his sweaty and icy hand. His fingers immediately clenched mine.

I pulled out some pills, I always carried around for such occasions as these, from my pocket and had some one hand me a glass of water. After some coaxing he swallowed the capsule and just sat against the wall on the inside of the train, next to the door. He stared at the ceiling, his pupils dilated. I saw a woman come over and she asked us if we needed anything.

We didn't.

When Peeta was able to walk, I guided him and seated him in a love seat in our designated compartment. A while after we were comfortable, the train screeched and started for the capital. After less than an hour, I glanced at Peeta who was seated next to me, and he was watching the horizon out the window. I wiggled my numb fingers that were still trapped in his, to get his attention.

He looked at me out of the corner of his eye. I smiled at him and his expression softened. He turned his head so that he could face me. I reached over to peck his lips. "What's wrong?" I asked. He sighed and shook his head. "Peeta..." I insisted. "I'm so unpredictable, and out of control, Katniss. I ruin everything. I wanted this trip to be a success, but I already started it off poorly." He confessed. I rolled my eyes and said "you just got a little out of hand, nothing the pills can't solve." I told him. "Those things just sedate me a little. Just a little out of hand? I punched a man for no reason! Don't humor me."

I glared at him before saying "I'm not going to argue with you about this." Then I stood up and headed to the room I shared with Peeta. I lay on the soft mattress, and curled up under the warm silk covers. I couldn't believe how curtly Peeta was taking this. Everyone on this train was most likely already aware of how Peeta gets when he's overwhelmed. It's not his fault, but he doesn't seem to understand that. Ten minutes had passed and I was beginning to drift off when I heard the door open and close swiftly.

I opened my eyes after a while, since no one spoke as I expected, and didn't see anyone. That's when I felt his large and warm arms cradle me close. I wanted to shrug him off but I couldn't make myself do it. His arms were so inviting and comforting, and I was so sleepy… "Sorry I got upset." His hot breath whispered against my ear. I shuddered as he kissed my neck. "Okay." I said as coldly as I could manage.

"Don't be angry. It's just that, I sometimes really hate what I've become okay?" I immediately unstiffened at his words. I let my muscles relax and willed myself to turn around and mold myself to his chest. "It's fine, Peeta." I kissed him, and nuzzled my head under his chin. "If I'm with you, yes, it is fine." I smiled after he said that. "Look on the bright side... this is the first time in weeks that you've had an episode." I said positively. I felt his head nod and he became silent.

I moved myself so I could see him properly, to find that he was asleep. I grinned, and laid my head and hand on his chest. We were still napping peacefully when I was woken up because I heard a knock on our door. Certain sing-song voice, that could only belong to the one and only Effie Trinket said "Dears! Come eat supper! The meal is truly splendid!" "We'll be right out!" I yelled. Peeta's eyes woke up instantaneously after I spoke.

I soothed him with a gentle stroke of his cheek and quietly told him we have to get up. He huffed as he moved his prosthetic leg in to the right position, so that he could stand up.

We went to join the others in the dining room. All eyes were on us as we strolled in, our fingers laced together. I saw Peeta blush a delicate pink and I couldn't help doing it also. Haymitch probably sensed our discomfort and cleared his throat loudly; drawing the audience towards him. I observed our company. Effie and Haymitch were the only people I recognized, and that sort of depressed me.

I missed Cinna more than ever now. I wonder where my old crew was, Venia, Flavius, and Octavia... 'Maybe I'll see them soon' I thought to myself.

"Katniss, Peeta, this is Bertha, Ema, and Shiloh." Effie introduced us. "My name is Emanuel. People call me Ema for short." said a caramel-colored skinned young man, before shaking Peeta's hand, and giving me a light kiss on the cheek. I saw Peeta eye him carefully, but then, as if he decided nothing was wrong, he stopped. Bertha was an older woman. She had long wine colored hair, and light, almost white skin. She smiled at us, flashing a beautiful set of white teeth. "She is Shiloh." Effie informed us. 'Shiloh, what a pretty name' I thought to myself.

She was the prettiest girl I've ever seen. She was most likely a couple years younger than me. Her skin was pale, her eyes a cobalt blue, and her hair was midnight black. Her features were so perfect; full lips, high cheek bones, almond shaped eyes. She kissed both Peeta and me on the cheek. I watched her, the way Peeta eyed Ema. "So... had a nice nap?" asked Haymitch in between sips from his glass of what looked like whisky.

We both nodded.

"Okay, so, this event is crucial in the process of healing our nation." Effie explained. "Every single being in Panem was invited to participate if they like. We picked up Shiloh from district eight, right before retrieving you three." Effie said as she looked at Haymitch with disgust. "She is the daughter of the mayor of district eight and she has committed to designing outfits and to help me organize the time schedule." She glanced at Shiloh approvingly.

"Katniss and Peeta. You two will host the event, alongside President Paylor, obviously. It is important for you two and Haymitch to know what you are going to say as homage. You can either write it... or I will compose and redact it for you" she said raising her eyebrows in Haymitch's direction. I was betting my bow that Effie had already written Haymitch's speech.

Once we were seated and served our meals, Effie had already finished giving the rest of the details. Dinner passed by quickly after that.

Peeta and I were in our room when the train suddenly came to a stop.

"Fuel." Peeta muttered nearly audible. Then he looked up at me grinning and said playfully "Want to take a walk with me under the moonlight?" He then stuck his elbow at me to grasp. I curtsied and held onto it. We laugh silently until coming across a tipsy looking Haymitch near the door we were going to sneak out of. "Where are you two going?" He asked. "A walk. We'll be right back." Peeta answered flatly.

Haymitch narrowed his eyes at Peeta and then nodded and let us pass. The night air was cool and the moon was full. The silvery light cast upon the trees around us, made everything look dreamlike. We didn't linger very far from the train, so we wouldn't get left behind. Hand in hand we walked around feeling quite peaceful. When we came to a halt, Peeta's eyes bore into mine, yearningly. After a few moments his lips found mine and they greeted each other softly and tenderly.

I closed my eyes as I let the kiss fill my body with warm, pleasant types of sensations. I smiled and then Peeta opened his mouth but said nothing. I raised an eyebrow. "What do you want to say to me?" I asked. He shook his head. But I insisted, and didn't give up until he asked "Katniss do you want to…? Would you...?" He paused, shook his head slightly and started quickly, once more. "I mean, do you love me?" I smiled at him and chuckled softly.

"Why are you asking me this? Yes, Peeta, I do love you." He sighed, and again he parted his lips to talk but then closed them, as if deciding not to speak further. "What?" I asked him, annoyed. He shook his head and stared in to my eyes. Why was he acting so…strange? His lustrous sapphire eyes were so mesmerizing. I thought they were pleading for me to understand something, but I didn't know what.

His look was almost painful, and I was going to protest. I didn't though, I decided to let pass the fact that he obviously wasn't telling me something. I wanted to just enjoy this walk; I'll pressure him into telling me later. He would have to, eventually. Desperately grasping at the chance to change the subject, he took advantage of my silence. Peeta wrapped an arm around my waist tightly and then crashed his lips on to mine. He knew I wasn't going to press anymore, not for the moment anyway.

The next morning, it felt almost frightening to be woken up by Effie. Flashes of my horrible past experiences danced in my mind. After a warm shower, I looked out the window and saw the tiny buildings grow ever so slowly. We were finally arriving. I glanced back to the bed were Peeta had just been sleeping and found it empty.

'Where is he?'

I was beginning to raise an eyebrow in confusion when I felt a pair of familiar warm arms wrap around me from behind.

Found him.

He spun me around and kissed me good morning.

We apparently were not going to have breakfast in the train; Effie had told us that President Paylor wanted to see us as soon as possible, so that meant breakfast in the president's mansion. I sighed because I didn't want to. I wanted to be back home, eating bread made by Peeta's hands, with tea. I was already homesick. Right before we were going to get off the train Haymitch struck his arm in front of me, blocking my exit.

I glanced at Peeta, and he was pale; he looked worried. "Whoa there, sweet heart. Put this on before you step off." He tossed a tiny silver object from his shirt pocket to me. When I caught it, I realized it was a ring. It was indescribable how furious I was and I stared accusingly at Peeta. "Why?" I started to shout, but I then understood immediately.

Haymitch spoke my thoughts "You're still engaged you know. Married even. The show is not quite over. You don't have to act so much now, but just do me a favor and wear the damn thing. It will reflect severely on all of us if the people of Panem learn that 'the star crossed lovers' were all just a huge act. Wear it. Get through this week and you'll never have to come back here again. Got it?" Haymitch commanded. I glared at the shiny circular piece of metal as I shoved it on my finger.

I reluctantly held hands with Peeta as we stepped off. I tried to mask my irritation, but I wasn't sure I was doing a decent job. I thought I was done acting for these people. This show was, without a doubt, not over.


	16. Chapter 16

Hello (: sorry I take so long to update. Hope you like this chapter. Let me know!

Chapter 16-

Peeta-

I wanted the earth to swallow me up. I looked up at the brilliant blue sky, and took a deep breath. 'It might be my last.' I thought. Judging by Katniss' hard expression, she'll be the one to do the job. I was guessing she wanted to strangle me. I felt absolutely horrible and she didn't help. Katniss would glare at me every time she would get the chance.

When we escaped the flashing cameras and stepped inside the presidential mansion, Katniss released my suffocating fingers immediately. I stretched them, hoping I could still feel them.

A woman came to greet Haymitch, Effie, Shiloh, Ema, Bertha, Katniss and I. She smiled at me. In the corner of my eye, I saw Katniss crinkle her nose. The woman told us that President Paylor would be down in about twenty minutes. Effie was in quite a good mood, since we had arrived early. Haymitch on the other hand, wasn't. He was dealing with a hangover and was looking at Katniss, the same way she was looking at me.

After the woman walked away, Haymitch put an arm around Katniss' shoulders and lead her away from the group.

I was beginning to think that Katniss was overreacting. She just had to put a stupid ring on, nothing major. Though I understood her, I too, was sick of acting and lying. I didn't show it though like she did though.

Effie rested a hand on my shoulder and that brought me back to reality. "Come on Peeta." She said. I nodded. Katniss was at my side, once more. I wonder what Haymitch had said to her, for her to be almost normal again. She still was a bit flushed, and clenched my fingers tightly, but at least the scowl had dissolved from her face.

As I observed her, I wanted to kiss her; I had the urge to make her smile, and to make everything alright in her mind. Though, if I kissed her, she would probably just knock the lights out of me.

When I glanced at her, now, stormy gray eyes, I saw they were locked on something. I followed her gaze and found the New President of Panem, beaming in our direction. Images of the last time I saw this woman flashed in my mind, she seemed to have gained weight, and she also looked very fit. Her dark brown hair had grown to her shoulders. Her dark eyes were welcoming.

"Hello Katniss." She said, before hugging her. After pulling away, she nodded in my direction and said "Hello, Peeta." Then she addressed Haymitch and Effie, and was introduced to Bertha, Shiloh and Ema.

She smiled a brilliant and even smile and waved her hand so we would follow her.

While walking down a long hallway, with the President in the lead, I looked back and found that only Haymitch was behind Katniss and me. I glanced at Katniss and asked "Where are the others?" she looked behind her, and raised an eyebrow as if just noticing and she shrugged her shoulders. "Probably went to do other things." She guessed.

"Are you still annoyed?" I asked timidly. She turned her face to look at me and pursed her lips. She smiled and said quietly "Once we're alone you have a lot of explaining to do. So yes, I am." I chuckled softly. I guess she isn't that angry if she is able to joke. I wrapped an arm around my girlfriend's waist, and together we continued to follow President Paylor.

She lead us in to a large room, with a round table and a complete living room set, couches, loveseats, loungers and even a coffee table. "Make your selves comfortable" she told us gesturing towards the sofas. Haymitch plopped himself down on a recliner, while Katniss and I sat on a loveseat. President Paylor remained standing while she waited until we were settled, and then she began to speak "I appreciate your presence, it will make things so much easier." She said brightly.

"So, as you were aware, a final honorary Hunger Games was to be arranged, by Alma Coin herself." I frowned remembering that meeting and the feeling of disbelief when it was agreed on. "I, as the new head of Panem, have decided not to continue the atrocious pageants. It seems to me, hypocritical, for we had fought to stop them, and to even think of establishing one a new, is just unbearable. So this is why this ceremony is taking place. Do you three not agree?"

"I agree completely" I said, just as Haymitch grunted. Katniss nodded. "Very well." She said smiling, and then began to pace around the room. "The event will be of two days length. On the first day, we will re-tell our extensive and painful history. We will speak of the games, and honor our victors. We will not go in to great detail, except for the Seventy-Fifth Annual Hunger Games." She glanced at Katniss and then at me. When she locked her coffee colored eyes with mine, I saw a hint of apology. I nodded, and whispered "It's fine."

"I apologize if this is inconvenient for any of you, but it is required. It was essential to the revolution, after all. After we speak of this process, we will highlight what has happened in every district, starting with eight, who held the first uprising, and finish with district two, who was last to come to their senses." I felt Katniss stiffen next to me. I let my hand wander until I was able to grasp her cool hand. I pulled it on to my lap and cupped it with both of my hands.

President Paylor acted as if she saw nothing and continued. "If Katniss doesn't mind, we might even show some of the old propagandas. Think about it, will you?" she stopped pacing to stare at Katniss. When Katniss didn't respond, Paylor continued striding. "We will also state what happened in district thirteen, and we will honor Peeta for his warning. The event on day one will conclude with the rescue of the captured victors, and with the procedure of how squad 451 entered the capital. There be a little suspense, ha-ha." She told us.

"Day two will not be so gloomy. We will narrate how the fall of the old capital came to be, and then, the names we have gathered over the course of the year will be venerated. That's where you two and Haymitch come in." The president glanced at Haymitch who was snoring, gave him a disapproving frown and continued "Er, or maybe just you two. You will read the names of the fallen, is that alright?" She asked. I thought about it for a moment. Katniss squeezed my hand, so I looked over at her.

I couldn't quite read her expression. She nodded at me, and it took a few seconds to understand that she actually wanted to do this. I gave her a halfhearted smile and we looked up at the brown haired woman in front of us. "It'll be an honor." Katniss agreed. A huge smile lit up the president's face when she said that.

"Oh, marvelous! Thank you. The speeches you are to compose are going to be about life now, after the rebellion. You may also say some words about anybody you have lost." As she said that, I could see that she was trying not to look at Katniss or me. "After that, we will appreciate the benefits that we now acquired, to reassure the people that everybody's sacrifice has indeed paid off. The burning of the old flag and the Treaty of Treason will follow. We will create a new constitution. The presentation of the newest seal and flag of Panem, and the opening of a new plaza where we have constructed a statue in honor of everybody who fought for freedom, will be after. The whole event will close with a vast banquet and we will be dancing the night away, to end the ceremony on a good note." She finished.

Katniss smiled, and that made me grin too. "I really appreciate that you came. This whole event will just not be the equivalent, without the Mockingjay or the saving voice. Or the brains behind the entire operation." I saw Haymitch turnover in his recliner and still couldn't believe he was part of that mission. "Well" the president's voice tore me from my thoughts. "I really must go help with some preparations. Thank you, once more. That is the plan." She gestured towards the door and Katniss and I stood up.

Katniss made her way to Haymitch and she shook him awake. He yelped as if in pain and Katniss rolled her eyes. After some persuading she got him to walk clumsily towards the door. "See you later." President Paylor's voice called sweetly after us. We let Haymitch wander off in to a room that I think was the dining room. Our fingers were laced loosely this time, so my fingers weren't numb.

We crossed Effie in the long hallway "How did it go? Isn't it planned so exquisitely? It begins so dejectedly, and then it gets cheerier ..." I lost her there. She babbled on for a while until Katniss interrupted her, and asked where our room was. Effie told her, and Katniss pulled me along with her.

As we entered the elegant room, Katniss let her hand fall from mine. I heard the door lock behind me and I groaned. A few moments later, a pair of lovely gray eyes, were staring up irritably at me. "What?" I asked. "Talk." She said.

I didn't actually know what she wanted me to say. She held up her left hand and I saw the single, tiny, sparkly gem on the silver ring around her finger.

I would never give her something so simple.

"You could have given me a heads up, Peeta." She said. "I tried Katniss. On the walk we had remember? I was trying to propose to you. But it felt horribly wrong. I didn't want you to think that I was doing it just for the capital, just for show. After that I didn't get the chance to talk. You fell asleep, right after we got back on the train." I told her, a little annoyed now, myself.

Truth was that when I proposed to her, it would be perfect. I want it to be just right. I will do it because I feel she is ready, and I won't be pressured in to it by Haymitch or anybody. I will propose to her because I love her.

I took a quick look at her face and it was blushing. She opened her mouth, closed it and then she stuttered through "Oh, that's why Haymitch let us go...He knew about this? I understand why you were so strange that night. I'm, I'm sorry I blamed you. It's just that, I felt betrayed. I couldn't believe that you wouldn't tell me something like this...Sorry I got angry at you." She finished and then buried her face into the spot between my neck and shoulder.

'Okay... That went smoothly.' I thought.

I kissed her hair and stroked it. I felt her arms tighten around my neck. After hugging for a few moments, my lips were longing for hers. I lifted her up, so her legs were wrapped around me. She laughed against my skin, and I smiled. I made my way to the stunning white draped bed, still carrying her. I sat down on it, with her on my lap and facing me.

I felt her fingers twirl around with the hair on the back of my head. I stared in to her eyes said "You're gorgeous." She began to shake her head so then I kissed her.

Her lips were soft, willing and inviting. As she kissed me back, her arms grew tighter around my neck. Her chest molded against mine. I held her waist snug, and pulled her as close as I could get her.

When she pulled away, she gasped. I chuckled and moved one of my hands from her hip to her face. I cupped her cheek gently. I gave her a quick kiss on the nose, playfully. "I love you." I said.

"Always." I whispered to her ear, and then pressed my lips against her neck, and she shuddered. I faced her and pressed my forehead against hers, so our noses were touching. "I love you too, Peeta." She whispered.


	17. Chapter 17

**Hello:3. Sorry for the tardiness. Thanks for aaaaaall the views:'). Review to let me know what you think n.n **

**Chapter 17- Reunion. **

**Katniss-**

I was in the room I shared with Peeta, spilling a few tears as I wrote out my speech. It was harder that I thought. That's when Effie came in, dressed from head to toe in a buttery-yellow dress, to check on me. "Are you done yet dear?" She asked. I shook my head, and then rested it on my crossed arms over the desk I was sitting at. "I'm almost done." I said.

"Katniss, I need that by tomorrow morning. There is only one day left! We need to get your speech printed. Oh and what will you be wearing?" She asked. I sighed, impatiently. "I'm wearing Cinna's old gown, my pin and flat shoes. Octavia, Flavius and Venia will do my make-up; my mother will ready my hair. It's all set." I was losing my train of thought, talking to Effie about things we have already discussed.

"I really do think you should reconsider wearing heels." She said after making a disapproving noise with her mouth. "You should check on Haymitch, Effie. I think he needs help with his outfit preparations." She left the room instantly saying "Oh, that is true!"

I went back to writing out word by word, my emotions. I poured my feelings in to my speech. It will be unforgettable, and I was feeling very proud of my progress. I was dabbing a tear away when I heard the door creak softly and slowly open. I glanced towards Peeta, who was on our bed, stomach down. He stared at me from his own speech, and raised an eyebrow at me and then at the door.

I got up to close the door, when I saw someone was behind it.

It was my mother.

"I forgot to knock." was the first thing she said to me. Her cheeks were slightly pink. "It's okay, come in." I directed. I was a bit annoyed that she didn't say hello or anything. I guided my mother to the small living room in our suite. She did as I did, and sat down. Neither of us spoke. Luckily, Peeta came in the room, with his best smile on. "Mrs. Everdeen, it's been such a long time." He said as he shook her hand.

She then, to my astonishment and probably Peeta's too, pulled him in for a hug. "Nice to see you Peeta. Thank you so much for caring for my Katniss. I can't express how grateful I am, to see her well. Thank you." He just nodded and smiled. I was so annoyed by now; that I could have said so many horrible things. "My pleasure." He said to her with a smile.

I rolled my eyes and said sarcastically "It's nice to know that you two are getting along."

Peeta eyed me curiously, and then frowned. I glared at him and then I turned towards my mother. "So, _mom,_ how's district 4? The hospital? I bet you don't miss district 12 one bit." I spat at her. Gale and she had left me all alone. Since they have those extravagant new jobs they forgot all about twelve, our old life and...about me. "Katniss don't get the wrong idea..." She began. "I don't want to hear it mom." I told her. "Just run along to district 4 once this is all over. Just disappear like you always do. Old habits die hard, huh?" As I heard myself speak, I could feel the venom that clung to my words. I could practically feel the pain it would inflict on my mother.

I almost felt sorry. I still didn't understand why I was left unaccompanied in twelve. Why was I left alone like a puppy out in the rain? I'll never know what runs through this woman's mind. The one that stands in front of me, tears welling up in her sky colored eyes. She opened her mouth to say "I'm sorry, I love you Kat-." But then closed it and swiftly left the room. My anger drained instantly, as I watched her leave, tears trickling down her face. I quickly glanced at Peeta and he was glaring at me.

"What the hell Katniss?" He stared after she closed the door behind her.

"What?" I asked innocently.

"Don't act. Why do you treat her like that?" He questioned.

"Like what, Peeta?"

"As if she did something ruthless. She just came to see you, after all this time." He stated.

"Why do you even care Peeta?" I asked, starting to get thoroughly annoyed.

"Because you clearly hurt her. You have to forgive her. She is not as strong as you are, Katniss. She can't bare the ghost town that has become of district twelve. I know you think that she left you. But she didn't, she's just protecting you, from seeing her zone out again. That's why she's in four, she just can't go back. It's overwhelming." He said.  
"You're one to talk about forgiveness. 'You have to forgive her' says the man who won't forgive Haymitch." I shot at him.

"That's different." He said flatly.

"It's not." I countered.

He waved away that conversation.

"Katniss, she is your mother. I can't believe you are being so unnecessarily rude!" He said loudly.

"Peeta, you don't know anything about our relationship." I shouted back.

"I know enough to know that she loves you a lot, and she loved prim too. I know that you love her too. It's a shame you don't show it." he said in a softer tone.

I sighed, really not wanting to continue this conversation.

"Why are you even arguing with me about this?" I asked frustrated.

"Because I argued with my mother all the time, just like you. Now, I don't have her anymore. I'm left with that horrible feeling of longing, because I never got the chance to tell her I loved her. Or to my father, or brothers for that matter." I watched as his tears streaked his lovely face.

"So I feel you should treat her better, because you never know when fate will take her too." He said desolately.

I speculated what it would be like, to not have my mother anymore; it wasn't something pleasant. He wiped something from my cheek, and I saw the tip of his finger was moist. I didn't realize I was weeping.

I stepped back, and sat on the couch, elbows on my knees and head in my palms. "While you're quarreling with her about simple things, I'm here mourning my mother's departure. I'm feeling grief and sorrow. While you don't want to see your mother, I'm wishing that she would visit me in a dream at least. Try to mend your relationship will you? You two were getting along right before the victors' tour." He then became silent, as he waited for me to respond.

I couldn't speak though; I was frozen by his words. His words have once again amazed me, the way it affects you and makes you see and understand things you didn't before. He was correct of course; I should appreciate my mother's company, because eventually, I won't have the chance to. I nodded and slowly looked up at him. He was leaning his back on the wall, his hands in his pockets, staring at me. He wasn't shedding tears anymore, though.

"Things are so much different since the victors' tour, Peeta." I said quietly. "I know Katniss, I know." he told me.

I got up and made my way towards him, seeking comfort in his warm arms. He took me in with no hesitation. He was stroking my hair as I said "I didn't know you felt that way, Peeta." I felt him shrug. "I miss my father even more." He told me.

I would have loved to meet his family, even his witch-for-a-mother.

Spend time with each member, argue over Peeta with his mother, chat with his father, and joke around with his brothers. I sighed at the thought, knowing it's obviously not possible.

"I'll try very hard to enjoy my mother." I said against his chest." Don't judge her so poorly. You wouldn't break down if you lost the love of your life? It was many years ago anyway, Katniss. Forgive and forget." He said with a playful tone. "If I lost you, I would probably do the same you know." He confessed quietly to the top of my head. He then kissed my fore head. A smile is all I could manage.

After we embraced, I went back to finishing my speech, and after a few paragraphs I was done. Peeta had finished before me, and he was lying in bed watching television. I curled up, head on his chest and joined him.

During the commercials, he tilted my face up to his and crashed his lips on to mine. Before I could respond more enthusiastically, there was a knock at the door.

After a couple seconds, it opened, before we could even think about getting to the door. I was still pressed against Peeta, and his arms were still wrapped around my waist when Gale came in to view. "You can say whatever you like to him. What I said earlier only applied to your mother." He whispered in my ear. I smiled and pulled away from him. We both got to our feet and our fingers were laced together automatically.

"Hey Gale." I said brightly. "Katniss. Sorry if I interrupted something." He told me, but I'm sure he didn't mean it. He then spread his arms out, inviting me in. I let go of Peeta's tense hand that was unwilling to let me go, and wrapped my arms around Gale's waist. He had the same perfume as last time, though there was something different.

He smelled sweet...like vanilla.

That's when I felt a slap on my arms. I looked over Gale's shoulder and saw a figure flash by. I pulled away from Gale and scanned the room until I found Johanna. She had her arms wrapped around a surprised-looking Peeta.

I glared at her, and she stuck out her tongue at me. "Get off him!" I shouted playfully at her. "Let go of my boyfriend and I'll let go of yours!" She challenged. I held up my palms, and stepped away from Gale. She let go of Peeta and said "Smart move Everdeen. I wouldn't want to take out my axe..." She said, smiling.

I laughed and in response said "I wouldn't want to take out my bow, Mason."

I then was pulled into a huge bear hug. I could smell the vanilla perfume that lingered on Johanna's hair, the same I could smell faintly on Gale. "I sort of missed you." I heard Johanna say to my ear. "Me too." I told her.

She let me go and I glanced at Gale and Peeta, who were looking puzzled. "What?" Johanna and I said at the same time. They shook their heads.

"Now you two should hug." Johanna said teasingly. "I'm good" said Gale. "Yeah, me too." Peeta stated. Johanna shrugged.

I made my way back to Peeta's side and wove my fingers with his. I saw both Joanna and Gale, stare at our intertwined fingers. They stopped immediately, though. I wondered what they were thinking. "The yellow colored woman told us to come get you." said Johanna. "Effie." I corrected. "Yes, her. We have to go rehearse and stuff." She finished. "Alright then, let's go." Peeta said. Johanna walked side by side with Gale just like Peeta and I, as we headed down the long hallways. The only difference was that Gale put his arm around Johanna's shoulders, as to Peeta and I walked hand in hand.

When we were nearing the door to the room Effie instructed, Johanna turned around, unexpectedly. She made a gesture with hands as if she were framing Peeta and me. "You two really look great together. I like it." She told us. I didn't know what to say, the only thing I did was blush. Peeta kissed my cheek and said "Thanks." Gale chuckled. "You two look nice together, too." I said quietly. I went wide eyed when Johanna kissed Gale full on the lips, and after pulling away she said "Yeah, we know." I couldn't help but smile.


	18. Chapter 18

**I'm so sorry :c . It's been so long! But here is chapter 18 (: I hope you like it! Reviews are always appreciated! Let me know what you think (: Thanks for all the views guys :') **

**Chapter 18- Late.**

**Peeta**-

"Peeta! Eyes off of the ceiling and towards the audience please." Effie's voice sang, pulling me from my hazy thoughts. I stared off towards the invisible spectators.

"Johanna, dear, stand straighter." She instructed. I chuckled softly as Johanna made a face, and grunted, as she fixed her posture.

We were standing on a stage in one of the presidential Mansion's several rooms.

I was situated next to Katniss, precisely in the center of the platform; Katniss on the left, while I was to the right.

Johanna was standing at the far right hand corner of the stage. It looked like she was flanking me. Gale was in the same position as Johanna just that he was on the left.

"Right, so Katniss." She mused. "Once you've done the introductions with Peeta, you will split. You will go stand next to Gale and Peeta next to Johanna. After that, President Paylor will take your places in the middle of the stage. When she finishes what she has to say, Peeta and Katniss are to leave the stage along with Gale. Johanna stays, as Haymitch makes his way out, and together, you two will take center stage." She paused and looked around, and resting her gaze slightly on each of our faces.

"Is everybody following me?" she asked. She didn't wait for some of us to nod.

"Johanna and Haymitch will introduce each year of the Hunger Games. Starting from the first games, naturally, and will announce the corresponding victors of each pageant..." Effie babbled on and on.

I looked over at Katniss and raised an eyebrow as I mouthed "I can't wait until this is over." She nodded in agreement.

"Okay! From the top!" Effie ordered. We all exited the stage, just so we could step right on it again. We trudged behind the curtains once more; as I concluded that I despised rehearsal.

* * *

As we walked back to our part of building, Shiloh called behind us "Katniss!" in her very child-like voice.

Shiloh was so differently dressed from when we arrived in the Capital. She was dressed in a puffy fuchsia dress that Effie would definitely approve of; and I'm sure she did.

Over the course of the two days that we've even in the Capital, Shiloh has sort of come to be Effie's personal assistant. I smiled as she sprinted towards us.

"Hey, I just wanted to inform you that President Paylor is having a dinner, Er, gathering… tonight at six thirty and she would be delighted, if you guys would come, that is if you two can." She said after coming to a halt in front of us.

I had a feeling that we really didn't have a choice; after all, she is the president.

I looked to my left at Katniss. She pursed her lips, and I knew that she was thinking the same as I was.

We must attend.

Katniss squeezed my hand, so I understood that I had to speak. "Of course we'll go Shiloh." She beamed at us.

"Okay." She whispered as she awkwardly stood in front of us, possibly waiting for us to leave first.

"See you at six." Katniss muttered as she turned me around and lead us to our room.

My leg was feeling exhausted from walking off and on the stage, and also from standing up for extended periods of time.

As soon as I stepped inside the extravagant suite, I sighed with relief.

'Home sweet, temporary home.' I thought, smiling.

I swiftly made my way to the master bed room and practically threw myself on to the queen-sized bed, after taking off my shoes of course.

After a while, I drifted off, in to a dreamless slumber.

* * *

I woke up, when I heard Katniss shuffle in the kitchen.

I shifted so that my back was against the headboard and my legs were sprawled out comfortably.

I heard Katniss slam a cabinet shut. "Can you bring me a water bottle please?" I yelled in her direction as I started flipping through the channels on the television.

Katniss came into the room with both of her hands full, one held two bottles of water and the other had an apple and a hand-sized loaf of wheat bread.

"Hungry?" I asked as she tossed me the bottle. "Yes! That's the only reason I got. And this is all there is in the Kitchen." She said jokingly holding up her rations.

I wondered when she came and fell asleep next to me.

I chuckled at her complaint.

"Come here." I demanded as my arms spread apart to receive her. She set her bread and fruit on the end table and flung herself into my arms.

The bed made a horrible creaking sound, but nothing broke.

She chuckled and I asked "Why are you laughing?"

"You looked so startled." she told me. I rolled my eyes in response.

She snuggled up against my side, and I kissed her forehead. In reply, she pressed her lips against the back of my hand, which belonged to my arm, that she was resting her head on.

I tilted her head up, so that I could see her eyes. "You have the most gorgeous grey eyes." I told her, yet again. She just stared at me.

Out of impulse, I kissed her.

Her sweet lips, the flutter of her eyelashes against my skin, the feel of her warm breath, are all perceptions that I would under no circumstance trade for anything else in this entire universe.

At times like these, I lose it, though not completely.

I do my best to control myself, but her lips have no mercy.

Her touch bounds me to an unfamiliar rush I acquire.

My skin goose bumps and I intensify the kisses. My hearts beats faster, pumping intense sensations through my veins.

At times like these, when I have her alone, all to myself, relaxed and at as much peace as we can manage is when I desire her.

I despise myself for it. I don't like thinking of her that way; my image of her in my mind is so pure, so delicate and simply **beautiful.**

I don't want to ruin that image by thinking of her in a lascivious way. At least, and I loathe of myself for even commenting it, but at least not for now.

At moments like these is when I feel lust.

It's a new feeling to me, so it was hard to control. I think I manage though, after all, I am a twenty year old man.

Before things got too heated up, I pulled away from her grasp and glanced at the clock on the end table.

It was five forty-six.

I began to worry instantly. "Katniss!" I said a bit too loudly.

She looked up at me, cheeks glowing pink, and lips turning a ruby tint.

I wanted to lock my arms around her and never let her go, but I couldn't. 'Damn dinner.' I thought.

"What-" she started but then she too, looked at the clock. Katniss removed herself from on top of me promptly, and then she speedily locked herself in the bathroom, calling behind her "I'll take a shower first!"

I sighed and wondered how much she would take.

I was starting to search the channels on the TV, when I decided I should get my clothes picked out.

I laid a pair of black jeans, a fawn, cotton long-sleeved shirt, a dark coffee-colored jacket and loafers of the same hue, on the bed.

Since Katniss was still in the shower, I spread an olive colored, knee-length cocktail dress, and mushroom- colored stilettoes. Though I think, she'd rather throw the heels out the window, than wear them.

Just as I was picking out a chal for her, she marched through the bathroom door.

I glanced at the time; it was seven minutes past six. I gestured towards her clothes and she glared at me. I smiled weakly and bolted to the shower. I undressed and hopped right in.

* * *

"I don't know how to do my make-up!" Katniss exclaimed.

I glanced over at her, as she hovered in front of the mirror. I tried not to laugh.

"I'll help you, give me a second." I told her.

"It's six twenty-six! We don't have a second. We should have already been there." She said, agitated.

I finished slipping on my shoes and walked to her side. "You look stunning without make-up you know." I stated.

She exhaled.

"Hmm." I hummed as I stared at her perfect face. I'm no make-up artist, but I think I know a thing or two.

"I have no idea how to put-" I read the label on a little bottle of skin-colored cream, which matched Katniss' tone perfectly. "- Foundation. So I'll just do your eyes." She nodded.

With various brushes, I spread eye shadow on her eyelid, using an earthy-green palette, that matched her dress.

I blended the many shades of green so they looked like a scale of light to dark. I finished the look, with a soft, auburn eyeliner.

Pecking her nose, I signaled I was finished.

I handed her an extremely light pink lipstick from her make-up case, for her to put on.

Hurriedly, I helped her brush her hair and blow dry it.

After much cursing we were out the door, looking very presentable. We speed-walked through the hallways.

Katniss almost decided to pry her heels off, so that we could run.

I vetoed that idea.

We paused in front of the huge, wooden, double door that lend in to the enormous dining room, and took deep breaths.

We fixed other's hair and clothes, and then laced our fingers. "Let's do this." We whispered.

Unfortunately, the doors decided to creak loudly as it open, while we stepped in.

I saw Katniss put her best smile on, and I greeted everybody.

Thankfully, as I scanned the room, I saw as Effie gestured us over to sit at her table; the main table.

The room had more than a few round tables with approximately eight people each.

Katniss and I were to be seated at the large rectangular table at the center, though far back, almost against the wall.

The smaller tables, from what I could see, held people who helped organize past-tomorrow's event.

The make-up artists, stylists, technical supervisors, the photographers… Everybody that is going to help make this possible.

The longest table, where we were to sit, were seated everyone who is going to be on stage at the ceremony.

We strolled across the room, to the table. After a while, people stopped staring and returned to their appetizers.

We sat down next to each other, as President Paylor beamed at us.

"I thought you two wouldn't make it!" she told us with a worried tone.

"Well, here we are." Katniss said flatly. "And… we are so sorry for the tardiness." I expressed.

From across the table Effie informed us with an irritated look that "It is six forty-seven I hope you know."

We were quickly served our appetizers, and we finished it quite fast, since the main course would be served soon.

"What kept you guys?" Johanna, asked with a grin, from next to Effie and her boyfriend.

"We fell asleep." Katniss answered.

Johanna winked at me. I raised an eyebrow, as I heard Gale laugh.

We chatted through all the courses with Plutarch, Beetee, Shiloh, Haymitch, Effie, Johanna and Gale, and even with the President.

At the dessert buffet, Katniss got to reunite with her old crew; Octavia, Venia and Flavius. She was very glad to see them.

We also got to meet up with Tigris, and that really plastered a smile on my face, though she was quite alarmed by me at first.

After a few words though, she congratulated me on how much I have progressed. I wrapped an arm around my girlfriend, as I told Tigris that she was huge part of it.

Finally, we crossed paths with Mrs. Everdeen, Katniss was quite warm with her, and that helped improve my mood even more.

After dessert was over, President Paylor spoke.

She acknowledged every person who is taking part in the event, and she said some words about what an honor it is to be President.

Some women sobbed at how emotional the speech was.

We all raised our glasses and toasted to good fortune for this new and promising beginning for Panem.

"Cheers!" I heard a multitude of voice ring in union, bouncing off the walls, and making my glass vibrate.

After the roar of clapping, the dance floor was officially opened and a group of people with instruments appeared from behind a curtain near the left side corner of the room.

I bowed to my lady, as I invited her to dance. We strolled off laughing, with Johanna and Gale right behind us.

This event wasn't ball, but it turned out to be one. Sort of.

I have to say though; it was one of the best nights of my entire life.

**Don't forget to review (: **


	19. Chapter 19

**Hello C: This a long one! Hope you like it. Let me know (: Reviews appreciated. Thanks for everything (:**

**Chapter 19. Night mare.**

**Katniss-**

"NO!" I shrieked. A wolfish green-eyed mutation was running towards me.

I was in an autumn-colored forest. I could hear the crunch of the leaves, as I stomped on them.

Strangely, I wasn't frightened of the creature.

I hurried along, hearing the growling noise that rumbled in the mutt's ribcage.

I finally approached a clearing, in the middle there was a lake and it sparkled in the moonlight.

On the other side of the shore where I was standing, there was a white, ghostly figure.

I couldn't make out what it was exactly, but I knew I had to shield it.

'I must get to the other side, as fast as I can.' My mind screamed.

Without thinking, I started towards the lake's shore.

I was going to swim to the other side.

The water was murky and freezing cold.

I gasped as I launched myself in to it.

When I was approximately in the center of it, I started to relax.

"I'll save you!" I yelled to the pale figure, which was starting to become more comprehensible to the eye.

I raised an eyebrow, as it started to morph from snowy smoke, to a more solid body.

I panicked immediately, when I heard the snarl of the mutt, which now was accompanied by more wolfish creatures.

'No, no, no.' I thought.

I began to swim faster, kicking my feet with more power.

The mutts were advancing, yet they didn't go into the water, they ran on the coast.

About 10 yards from the smoke-like figure that was looking more human by the minute, my feet were immovable do to some kind of underwater plant.

The plant grasped my legs firmly, and that's when I started to cry.

I wasn't going to be able to reach the spectral being.

I screamed, as I felt burning tears streak down my face.

The mutts had reached the angelic-looking human.

I observed as her hair glinted under the moon's shine, she looked so beautiful.

I almost smiled.

I wanted desperately to call out her name, warn her about the mutations that were so close now, but I couldn't.

My voice failed me.

All I could do was weep and feel my tears as they rolled along my cheeks, as the wolves reached her, and preceded in tearing her to pieces.

I felt myself sink, as her sapphire-colored eyes stared straight at me, as she cried my name for the last time.

* * *

"Katniss! Katniss!" I heard vaguely.

I struggled against the force that was holding me; binding my arms together.

"Sweetheart, it's okay, you're all right. It's me." I heard the voice, clearer now.

I still resisted though.

"Let go of me!" I shouted, and was surprised at hearing my own voice.

I half-expected to be voiceless.

"Calm down, it was just a dream." I heard him say, in the most soothing voice he could manage.

I thrashed, struggling to be unbound, and then opened my eyes.

All I saw was obscurity.

My panic levels began to escalate again.

"Honey, it was just a night mare, stop kicking me." I blinked and did as the voice told me.

I knew that voice; it belonged to Peeta.

The light of a bedside lamp, which came from the left side of my vision, flickered to life and I could see I was in a very familiar room.

I felt a torso rise and fall right next to me.

I turned so I could face my boyfriend.

"Peeta-." Shaking my head, I began explaining in between sobs, as I finally registered his face. "-I have to save her, Peeta."

He pulled me closer to his chest, and wrapped his arms around me, hugging me comfortingly, and not so restraining like earlier.

"Sh-." He whispered to my forehead. "No you don't. Calm down. Everything's okay."

I stopped struggling, and pressed myself right alongside him, taking in his warmth.

His existence calmed me, though I was still shaking.

I buried my head near his collar and let all my feelings go.

I felt him stroke my hair as I wept.

He whispered words of comfort and safety to me, though I didn't perceive them at all.

I bawled for an extensive period of time.

Peeta did his best to calm me down, but my dream was so intense, I couldn't stop reacting to it.

When my body's trembling had stopped, I could make out Peeta's voice again.

"Katniss, stop crying, please. You're okay baby, I'm here." His voice was raspy, and it cracked.

I broke free from his chest and looked up at him.

His eyes were sealed shut, and a single tear made its way down his drowsy looking face.

With sharp, unintentional gasps of breath, I wiped his tear away.

His eyes opened immediately at my touch, and his blue eyes locked themselves with mine.

He smiled as he moved a strand of hair from my face and asked "Are okay now?"

I shook my head slightly.

He paused and then rephrased his question. "Are you better?"

I nodded.

I was afraid to speak, because I felt a knot at the back of my throat.

I placed myself back down, and stared at the ceiling.

Flashes of my dream came back to me, and the sensations were overwhelming.

I blinked my tears away; I didn't want to cry any longer.

I closed my eyes, and I could see images of the angelic figure, which now I knew who it represented.

I could feel once more, the feeling of desperation, anxiety and worry of seeing her standing there, helpless.

Not to mention the emotion of remorse when I wasn't able to protect her.

I did all I could, and once more; I failed to save my little sister, when she needed me most.

"_Katniss!" _my mind echoed, and this time, the remembrance wasn't from my dream, it was from my last memory of her pretty little face, of the last time I saw her alive.

When I was about to break down all over again, I felt Peeta's lips brush against my cheek.

My eyes fluttered open, and I saw him hover over me.

The smiled half-heartedly, but it faded quickly.

"I love you." I told him.

He jerked his head up from my cheek looking confused, as if he wasn't expecting to hear that.

"I love you too." He said.

Peeta looked like he wanted to say more, but for some reason, he didn't.

"I saw Prim. In my night mare, I couldn't guard her from those _things_. The feelings were so real, the images so vivid. I, I-." I expressed, tears welling in my eyes.

He shook his head, and said softly "Sh, sh. It's okay; you don't need to tell me."

I took a deep breath and forced myself to not feel the necessity to cry.

Peeta pecked me on the lips, and before he could return to the position he was laying in, I wrapped my arms around his neck and collided my lips with his.

He tensed for a few seconds, but then responded gently.

His kisses helped me forget my nightmare but not completely, and they filled me with the heartfelt, reassuring feelings I was so desperately craving.

As we intensified the kisses, he rested his back on the mattress, and he pulled me on top of him.

When we broke apart, I cupped his face with my hands, and lightly kiss him once more. I pressed my forehead to his and whispered "Thank you."

* * *

I woke up a couple hours later, on top on Peeta's slightly moving body, my arms wrapped around his neck, as if he was the teddy bear a child form of myself, couldn't sleep without.

When I focused on his face, I saw his eyes were open.

"Rise and shine." He said, beaming.

I kissed his lips, and then rolled off of him.

Peeta yawed as he stretched his, most likely, stiff body.

"You're quite comfortable." I told him.

He chuckled in response.

"Sorry you couldn't sleep last night. It felt like I was in tears for hours." I apologized, in a small voice and guiltily.

Peeta shrugged and then said "You were wailing for about five minutes, and then you woke up and wept for half an hour. I was beginning to fall asleep when you were starting to calm down. Don't say you're sorry... It's fine. I love having you in my arms. Plus, when you got over the crying, you gave me the best five-o'clock-in-the-morning kisses ever." He smiled saying the last part.

I grinned.

"Katniss?" he said.

I directed my gaze from the ceiling to him. "Yes?"

"You know, today's the big day right? Venia, Octavia and Flavius are going to come retrieve you in about fifteen minutes." He told me.

I glanced at the clock and it read:7:44.

I frowned and nodded in his direction. "Who's going to get you ready?" I asked and immediately regretted it.

I knew he was thinking of Portia and his former crew, because he sulked.

"I have no idea." He admitted.

I reached up to his face, stroked his cheek and then ran my fingers through his hair.

"Kiss me." He commanded, and I did.

* * *

"You are going to love this!" Octavia exclaimed.

I trudged behind the three, as they cheerfully talked about my outfit and make-up.

'How are they so full of energy at this hour?' I asked myself.

They lead me in to a massive room, which was divided by an elegant cream-colored drape-like curtain.

Venia told me that one side was for dressing, make-up and hair styling, and the other side for bathing, massages, pedicures and manicures, and waxing.

I shuddered at the thought of waxing and had the sudden need to cover my legs.

They directed me to a large bath tub and I was scrubbed from head to toe with all kind of liquids.

Unfortunately, after they finished washing my hair they, against my will, removed all the hair off my body.

Flavius told me they'd get to my eyebrows as soon as I was dried off.

When I was sitting on a spinning chair in front of a mirror, that was surrounded by brushes, blow-dryers and every hair accessory from sprays to hair clips, I was lightly tapped on the shoulder.

I was fiddling around with my newly manicured fingers, so I didn't see my mother sneak up on me, through the mirror.

I turned around expecting to see Octavia maybe, but I found a pair of blue eyes shyly staring back at me.

I suddenly remembered my night mare, and Prim's eyes were so alike to my mother's, it was heart-breaking, so was the blond hair.

The form of their eyes, and the exact shade made me want to bawl. Or scream at my mother to go away.

I did neither though.

"Good morning." She said sweetly.

All I could manage was a weak smile.

"Flavius sent me over here… he said you wanted me to braid your hair?" She asked.

I nodded, confirming the request.

As she combed through my hair, her fingers delicately and carefully unknotting my ponytail I slept in, I couldn't help but feel like a child again.

It also reminded me of the morning of my first reaping.

There I was, thinking of Prim again.

"Are you okay? You look like you saw a ghost." She asked, concerned.

Before I told her some rude comment, I paused, took a deep breath and told her about my dream.

It felt nice telling her, because she also would feel and understand my pain, and is the only person who can actually comfort me.

My mother didn't make a sound as tears fell, she just nodded when I finished.

She bent down, kissed the top of my head, and continued braiding.

* * *

"You look gorgeous!" Venia squealed.

I blushed a bit, as I look in the mirror that was taller than me.

I had on a half-black and half-white gown created by the one and only Cinna, of course.

It was lengthy and snug, and surprisingly comfortable.

I hadn't given in to Effie's suggestions, so I was using in black flat shoes.

Pinned right over my heart was my mockingjay pin, polished and gleaming.

My make-up was what Flavius called 'Smokey eye'.

I called it District 12: after you got out of the mines.

I didn't say it though, because they probably would become upset.

"Hey Everdeen!" I heard some call across the other side of the room.

My eyes searched until I found Johanna, strutting towards me in a bark-brown get up.

Was this the tribute parade again? Bad habits die hard, I guess.

As she came closer to me, I saw that at the edge of her eyes, the coffee-colored eyeliner grew into branch-like forms, almost reaching her temples.

'Really?' I asked myself.

After she hugged me in greeting, she said "It's so weird seeing you in a dress."

"It's odd seeing you with clothes on." I teased.

She laughed a mock laugh.

"Well, come on now, we have to go meet Gale and bread boy." She said.

I rolled my eyes and followed her out of the room, after I waved at my prep team and mom, to which they yelled "Good luck!"

Peeta was dressed in white and black as I was, and Gale in dark brown, which matched Johanna's outfit perfectly.

Seeing Gale and Johanna together brought a smile to my face, but it also gave me a sense of longing.

I missed the days were it was just him and me.

I had so many things to tell him; after all, he was still my best friend. Or so I thought.

I frowned slightly, and didn't notice Peeta was looking at me.

He followed my gaze to the couple and then sighed.

Without saying a word, he wrapped an arm around my waist and kissed me on the cheek and whispered in my ear. "You look stunning, let's go."

The four of us were guided outside the front doors of the Presidential mansion by Effie and on to the front lawn, where we were ushered in to a black van, and driven to the training center.

Until then, I didn't even give a thought to where this event will be held, so it was a surprise for me.

After being dropped off; we walked towards the building behind the stage.

Before the curtain closed, I could catch glimpses of it.

It was a medium sized stage, decorated with red drapes, flashing lights and an enormous screen that took up the whole back wall.

The podium stood off to the side, and it had a plate-sized replica of my mockingjay pin on the front of it.

I wondered what the podium was there for, since Peeta and I weren't going to use it.

Then I assumed the president will make use of it.

Turning around, I could see people; small specs from where I was standing, filling up the seats surrounding us.

I remembered how many people fit on the stands.

No wonder its taking place here.

In my mind, I could see the chariots riding in.

I shook the thought away.

There was plenty of room, so people would be accommodated and comfortable.

Huge displays plagued the space, so everywhere you looked and no matter where you were seated, you could see the stage and the people on it.

"This is going to be huge." I thought, as I made my way back to Peeta's side.

When we walked in the training center building, there were decorations all over the place.

Everywhere.

Drapes; gold and red, hung from the ceilings, from the floor to the roof, and even above the door.

The building had a different celebrative air to it.

Not like when the tributes were first dropped off here, to be pampered up, like pigs for slaughter.

That air was unnerving and depressing.

I wasn't allowed to go deeper in the place, but I could tell they did a lot of remodeling.

I supposed they took the weapons and targets out.

Before I could wander off with Peeta, Effie came to reclaim us.

"Come on dears! It's about to start. The curtains are about to open." She shrieked.

"Someone's nervous." I heard Johanna mutter.

Gale smirked.

I gripped Peeta arm tighter, as we strolled to the steps that lead to the top of the stage.

Taking a deep breath and trying not to lose my cool, I glanced at Peeta, who also was looking pale-faced, but he smiled encouragingly.

The lights flashed on, and the curtains drifted apart, revealing the stage.

Johanna, confident smile plastered on her face as if this was the easiest thing to do, and Gale who had a bored expression, together walked onto the platform and took their places.

Peeta moved us forward, and the crowd roared.

The audience clapped and whistled.

'Smile.' I told myself as we took center stage.

I was glad I still had Peeta next to me and that we didn't have to split.

Standing side by side, we waved to the multitude.

Microphone in hand, Peeta greeted the spectators.

"Good afternoon, Panem!"

* * *

**Hope you liked it (: Don't forget to review! **


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